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Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML

#21056453
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20607) - you deserved it (38726)

On 02/10/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, in the middle of telling my mother about my engagement, she suddenly broke down in tears about her problems at work and her loveless marriage, and abruptly hung up on me. FML

Today, my cat pissed all over my work clothes. They weren't even on the floor, she knocked the hanger down just so she could use them as a toilet. FML

#21073377
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36078) - you deserved it (4438)

On 02/27/2014 at 5:42pm - animals - by baxeh - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I had to proofread a document my boss had written. When I pointed out that he spelled "college" as "collage" multiple times, he angrily accused me of trying to make him look stupid. This is the guy who constantly boasts about his "genius" IQ level to the whole office. FML

#21071350
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38815) - you deserved it (3232)

On 02/25/2014 at 3:42pm - work - by cunting cuntface of a boss (man) - Australia

Today, at the café I work at, I was yelled at by a woman because the drinks and food she ordered were "taking too long". Before I had the chance to get a word in, she stormed out and said she would never come back. I didn't get the chance to inform her that she hadn't ordered yet. FML

#21106207
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43233) - you deserved it (3295)

On 04/06/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was sitting on a bench outside a supermarket waiting to be picked up, when a old lady walked out of the shop. She hadn't noticed me and sat on the bench beside me. She looked around and saw me, rolled her eyes, got up and moved to a different bench. FML

#21090670
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35274) - you deserved it (3463)

On 03/19/2014 at 6:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went on a trip to Cleveland. After getting lunch, my brother and I started walking back to my car. Halfway there, we were jumped, threatened with a knife, and yelled at to hand over our money. The only thing my brother could do was ask our mugger, "Uh, what gender are you?" FML

#21098906
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38177) - you deserved it (3382)

On 03/28/2014 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was bored at work, so I started browsing the Internet. While I was on my Facebook page, my boss tagged me in a status: "I've been standing behind you for ten minutes." FML

#21134321
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23185) - you deserved it (47924)

On 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by notbrowsingnow (man) - United States

Today, I joked to a client that every time I see his name, I start singing the song 'Dr Jones' by Aqua. He looked blankly at me, so I broke into song, 'Dr Jones, Dr Jones, calling Dr Jones... ' He still looked blankly, but now also utterly horrified, as were the rest of the waiting room. FML

#21119159
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32379) - you deserved it (10443)

On 04/21/2014 at 5:26pm - work - by banana_tree - United Kingdom

Today, I had a nightmare and woke up in a cold sweat. My girlfriend was in bed with me at the time, and swears I yelled out another girl's name. She considers this proof that I'm cheating on her, and now she won't even speak to me. FML

#21129594
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41995) - you deserved it (4912)

On 05/03/2014 at 12:50pm - love - by wtf - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML

#21150544
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48333) - you deserved it (3906)

On 05/24/2014 at 7:57pm - misc - by Congrats to me - United States (Ohio)

Today, at college, I was frantically trying to finish an essay on gay rights that was due less than an hour later. In the end I failed, because the college internet filters kept classifying every single page containing the information I needed as "sex", and blocked it all. FML

#21166210
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38813) - you deserved it (13771)

On 06/07/2014 at 3:16pm - work - by fstfckd (man) - United States



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