Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, the 75 year old blinding owner of the bar I work at called me over and told me to fire "Rachel, the stupid c**t after the next wrong thing she does". My name is Rachel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44779) - you deserved it (2598)
On 03/03/2009 at 3:26am - work - by nicooolea (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked home from work when a woman asked me to come inside for a free meal. It was at a homeless shelter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29398) - you deserved it (4180)
On 02/19/2009 at 6:42pm - misc - by Kev (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while getting off the bus, there was a lady in front of me wearing a dress and suddenly her phone dropped out of her bag. I picked up the phone for her which landed right beneath her dress and as she turned around she thought I was trying to take pictures of her panties and slapped me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38775) - you deserved it (3465)
On 03/04/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by AznKoreanGuy (man) - United States (California)
Today, a kid I coach on a regular basis was talking to me about what I did outside of work. After we were done with the conversation, she told me with a straight face that I need to get a life and get a boyfriend. She's 10. And she's right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47072) - you deserved it (8655)
On 03/25/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by gymnasticscoach (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was so totally stressed out at work that I took my car into the park and reclined my seat and shut my eyes. Soon I noticed the soothing sounds of raindrops on my car and I felt a little better for once. I opened my eyes to see that a bunch of birds had crapped all over my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28998) - you deserved it (2267)
On 05/14/2009 at 5:09pm - work - by overlandparkmommie (woman) - United States
Today, I checked in a group of men from Mexico. I speak just enough Spanish to realize they're discussing my breasts. I have to stand there smiling while checking in three more people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26279) - you deserved it (2669)
On 10/03/2009 at 6:31am - work - by Spanishredhead (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend texted me telling me how much he loved me, and that he wanted my virginity. We have already done it. I don't think he meant to send that text to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19786) - you deserved it (1502)
On 10/10/2009 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by screwed.over (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20241) - you deserved it (2617)
On 09/02/2009 at 5:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I told my boyfriend of 2 years that I was pregnant. His response? "That's neat. But we can still have sex, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (16295) - you deserved it (3184)
On 09/13/2009 at 3:04am - intimacy - by sunlightchild_14 (woman) - United States (South Dakota)
Today, my mom tells my sister that she is worried about her because she has a headache and feels like she might be getting a slight cold. I have had the flu for two weeks and have a 103 degree fever. I ask, "What about me?" Her response? "Stay away from your sister." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24319) - you deserved it (1740)
On 10/30/2009 at 8:05am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17443) - you deserved it (1412)
On 09/24/2009 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Madison43097 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I tried to surprise my parents on their first day back from New York with candles I made. I used actual lavender flecks from our garden for the scent in the candles. My plan worked until the lavender caught on fire which then spread to all of our mail and newspapers. Welcome home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24487) - you deserved it (9180)
On 08/25/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I noticed a dent in the passenger door of my car. At first I blamed it on the door of another car. Then I remembered that my last passenger hadn't shut the door all the way, and I insisted on "showing him how it's done" by hip-checking the door shut. The dent perfectly fits my butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3485) - you deserved it (22527)
On 10/15/2009 at 1:41pm - misc - by onei8785 (woman) - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
