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Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

#21397916
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29732) - you deserved it (2100)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:44am - work - by cock blocked (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got to see my best friend for the first time in months. Her first reaction was to say, "Wow, you gained a lot of weight." I actually lost a fair bit. FML

#21364630
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30597) - you deserved it (2660)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:14pm - misc - by boyishgirl - United States (Alaska)

Today, after 3 hours of sleep, I had to rush to my grandmother's house because she fell and couldn't get up. An embarrassed, half-naked old lady, a very wet rug, an ambulance and a trip to the hospital later, and she still refuses to use her cane and walker. I hope I'm not this stubborn when I'm old. FML

Today, I found my 15-year-old son sleeping on the couch. I asked why, and he said he'd rented his room out to someone on Craigslist to make extra money, so he was getting used to sleeping in the living room instead. FML

#21406874
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28993) - you deserved it (2356)

On 05/08/2015 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was wearing a new tank top that was really cute. I later was talking to an attractive guy and thought he was giggling at me because he thought I was being cute and funny. I then realized he was giggling at the fact that I only shaved one armpit. FML

#21378703
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27674) - you deserved it (9338)

On 03/21/2015 at 12:25am - love - by rayraydayday - United States (Colorado)

Today, my roommate and I are so broke, we resorted to going to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting just for the refreshments. FML

#21395180
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28263) - you deserved it (3677)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:50am - money - by jamongrande - United States (California)

Today, to my delight I discover that there is security camera in the storage room at my work. The same room where, two days ago I masturbated. FML

#265
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12047) - you deserved it (68632)

On 11/10/2008 at 4:11am - work - by tadam - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and said I was not 'Christian enough' for her. Later I found out she had been cheating on me with my best friend. FML

Today, in the middle of dinner, I went to rest my chin on my hand, missed, and stuck the straw from my drink straight up my nose. FML

#55148
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37664) - you deserved it (6923)

On 02/16/2009 at 6:36pm - love - by EK (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML

#75299
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48442) - you deserved it (9830)

On 02/19/2009 at 1:14am - animals - by zac545 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at church and saw a blind teenager who obviously felt lost. Feeling like I should help I went over and asked if he needed anything. He said, "I can't find my caretaker." I asked, "What does she look like?" FML

#159157
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15219) - you deserved it (59834)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by wideman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a blind date that my sister had set up. When I arrived at the coffeeshop, I approached a man waiting by the counter, asking if his name was Tim (my date's name). He looked at me and said no and then left with a drink clearly labeled "Tim" in bold letters. FML

#178001
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66238) - you deserved it (4092)

On 03/01/2009 at 11:20pm - love - by oprahahaha (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my name was called during an assembly because I won some sort of prize. Everyone booed. FML

#232169
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69176) - you deserved it (6242)

On 03/07/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by ladeda (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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