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Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML

#6300869
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34674) - you deserved it (2295)

On 11/14/2009 at 1:38pm - love - by asthma_attacker (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I started talking to a friend about how he needs to stop overreacting and getting angry very easily. He kicked sand up in the air, and it came back into his eyes. He started getting angry, and when I told him this is what I was talking about, he hit me in the nose. FML

#6268731
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24993) - you deserved it (6541)

On 11/12/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by angrymadman3542342 (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got fired. By my father. He wants me to drive him to work tomorrow. FML

#6517705
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27414) - you deserved it (2829)

On 11/29/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

#6632044
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8255) - you deserved it (21550)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by Wrongdoor (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was feeling confident enough to approach a guy by asking the bartender if I could buy him a refill of whatever he was drinking. He was drinking water. FML

#6454408
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19019) - you deserved it (4111)

On 11/25/2009 at 10:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at the costume rental shop I work at, when I saw a kid trying to walk out the door wearing what appeared to be one of our fake monster claws, so I chased him down and grabbed it. It wasn't. It was his prosthetic hand. FML

#6634050
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12178) - you deserved it (28228)

On 12/06/2009 at 1:37pm - misc - by lolfayce (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to the grocery store to stock up on booze for the weekend. After the cashier commented on the size my purchase, I claimed to be hosting a dinner party tonight. I'm not. FML

#6608304
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6013) - you deserved it (27901)

On 12/04/2009 at 11:08pm - misc - by Wino (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML

#6528264
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25101) - you deserved it (12100)

On 11/30/2009 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

#7176423
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22952) - you deserved it (6614)

On 01/06/2010 at 2:25am - misc - by Nox (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

#6708463
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14423) - you deserved it (20022)

On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year old guy. FML

#6763164
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6475) - you deserved it (26474)

On 12/15/2009 at 10:06am - misc - by wjones (man) - United States (California)

Today, after secretly smoking for more than 2 years, I decided to quit. I come home from work and I see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML

#7157355
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4572) - you deserved it (32266)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:55am - misc - by tanksfan (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I got a haircut, and after thanking the stylist I went up front to pay. The lady behind the counter took one look at me, smiled and said "well, now you'll need a hat." FML

#7196833
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21117) - you deserved it (2035)

On 01/07/2010 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)



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