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Today, I received a message from front desk that my concerned father is trying to contact me. I call only to hear that my parents were freaking out that I wasn't answering my phone. They saw me 9 hours ago. They were going to call the police. I'm in college and also don't live with them anymore. FML

#7416105
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27751) - you deserved it (2069)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:28am - misc - by over_protected (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my boyfriends' mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

#7354557
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29442) - you deserved it (5065)

On 01/15/2010 at 6:37am - love - by Jumja (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I found out that a water pipe at my work had burst over the weekend. There is absolutely no water in the building, including the bathrooms. It's a 9 hour day, and I took a laxative this morning before I came in. FML

#7276638
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23555) - you deserved it (9917)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:28am - work - by bs_happens (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought about my boyfriend and all the things we used to do together years ago. Today, I also spent the day doing my now husband's laundry and watching him sit on the couch with his hand inside his underwear. FML

#7957941
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23767) - you deserved it (5411)

On 02/07/2010 at 12:15am - love - by Bruja5 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML

#8663349
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5883) - you deserved it (24446)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:43pm - animals - by Shinobi_3 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that in my family, 'Father's Day' is more like 'Father's drunken, piss on a plant in the kitchen during breakfast, order you to scrub in between his toes with your toothbrush Day.' FML

#11329600
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you deserved it (3294)

On 06/20/2010 at 9:18am - misc - by Sam - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex girlfriend that never moved out. FML

#8631765
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28808) - you deserved it (2452)

On 02/25/2010 at 1:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was the designated driver for my friend's 21st birthday. On the way home from the bar, he threw up all the pasta and tequila he'd had onto the back seat of my car, and told me it was part of his whole party plan. FML

#13457559
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22168) - you deserved it (3627)

On 10/15/2010 at 10:08am - misc - by IhatebeingtheDD - United States

Today, after leaving work at 10 pm, I took a shortcut to the highway. After getting lost, my GPS informed me that the service was unavailable and I should try back in an hour. This occurred moments before I ran out of gas. FML

#8861127
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20630) - you deserved it (7531)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by Lost... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML

#13269256
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26225) - you deserved it (3914)

On 09/30/2010 at 9:55pm - love - by dontask (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boss quit his job and stopped coming in without warning. Guess who just inherited his tasks and responsibilities without the training or pay associated with his manager role. I was hired last year as a junior system admin. FML

#14267236
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22530) - you deserved it (2693)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:29am - work - by promoted (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after taking my jacket off at work, I found a large faint stain all across one side of my shirt. Turns out that my fiancé had used it to "clean up the bed." I am the manager of a supermarket with 40 employees. It was pretty obvious what it was. FML

#13674952
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22956) - you deserved it (4741)

On 11/01/2010 at 1:24pm - intimacy - by grimatwork (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I found out why my roommate and best friend comes home late three nights a week. She goes to get drunk with some guy, then goes back to his house to hook up. Who is this guy? The guy I've been dating for three years. FML

#9139236
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32424) - you deserved it (2668)

On 03/16/2010 at 7:17pm - love - by latenightbite - United States



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