Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my family sat me down and told me I was spending way too much time with my boyfriend and not enough time with them. My boyfriend has been away in Iraq for six months and just came home a week ago. FML

#6406317
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40295) - you deserved it (2162)

On 11/22/2009 at 3:03pm - love - by gj09 - United States

Today, my date sent me a text saying "I'm sorry we're running late, we will be there shortly." I replied asking what she meant by "we". She said her parents, who were coming along to chaperone. I laughed about two 27 year olds having chaperones, until she walked in with her parents. FML

#6258074
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34540) - you deserved it (2949)

On 11/11/2009 at 1:53pm - love - by Tragics (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I stepped on a piece of glass and sliced my right foot open. Hobbling to get my first aid kit, I tripped and stepped on a pair of heels, and sliced my left foot open. FML

#6192085
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32756) - you deserved it (4457)

On 11/07/2009 at 3:12am - health - by chairlee (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was looking at the annoucements in the newspaper and find out that my boyfriend of the past 6 years is supposed to be married in 2 days to what I thought was his ex-girlfriend. FML

#6335131
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37497) - you deserved it (3020)

On 11/16/2009 at 11:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML

#6605236
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30923) - you deserved it (7203)

On 12/04/2009 at 8:16pm - misc - by olive_costume (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was watching TV with my mom. The new Trojan Ecstasy condom commercial came on. I sat there awkwardly while my mom pulled out her shopping list. I bet you can guess what she added. FML

#6680888
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (2022)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by aawkward... (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML

#6591482
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30871) - you deserved it (2343)

On 12/03/2009 at 10:11pm - love - by holla1787 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML

#6751631
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24896) - you deserved it (4575)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:06pm - love - by Mojo (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML

#6812101
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25724) - you deserved it (4313)

On 12/18/2009 at 3:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom informed me that she saw me sleepwalking last night. I didn't think much of it, until I remembered that I went to bed without any clothes on last night. FML

#7014697
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25803) - you deserved it (6240)

On 12/29/2009 at 1:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, in an effort to repair our fake Christmas tree, my girlfriend succeeded in gluing it to the floor. I can't get it loose. FML

#6887897
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23100) - you deserved it (3663)

On 12/22/2009 at 5:53pm - misc - by blumaster04 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I decided to try whitening my teeth for the first time. I applied the strips to my teeth and decided to lay down and wait for the thirty required minutes to pass. I accidentally fell asleep and woke up three hours later. My teeth are still in excruciating pain and are covered in white streaks. FML

#6841945
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9485) - you deserved it (30229)

On 12/20/2009 at 2:52am - health - by nikko blue - United States (California)

Today, I backed into our new garage door. The same new garage door that we purchased because I broke our old one by backing into it. FML

#7137306
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6246) - you deserved it (39197)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:05am - misc - by Lil_bit - France



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: