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Today, I drove a drunk Venezuelan exchange student home after a prom party. Notable events: her puking on the way to the vehicle, her yelling in Spanish at the top of her lungs in the car, her puking out the window in the moving vehicle, and her crying because she felt bad for making me drive. FML

#3053433
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38505) - you deserved it (4456)

On 06/20/2009 at 3:37am - misc - by DesDri (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on a double date at a restaurant with two friends of mine and a guy I really liked. Things started getting really quiet so I decided to start talking to make things a little bit less awkward even though I was eating. I ended up spitting a piece of chicken across the table. FML

#2645641
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14481) - you deserved it (40048)

On 06/05/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that the only human being I have talked to in the last three days is the guy at the drive thru. FML

#1933415
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41800) - you deserved it (14860)

On 05/14/2009 at 3:47pm - misc - by shrimp41 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my cat kept sneezing all morning so I took her to the vet. $150 later and the vet says she's fine. I get home and the noise starts up again. My automatic air freshener spray sounds just like my cat sneezing. FML

#2107196
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15565) - you deserved it (47514)

On 05/20/2009 at 5:07am - animals - by catlover (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got an e-mail from a guy I'd had a one night stand with. He wanted to get together to talk about it. Turns out he's in rehab and he wanted to address the biggest mistakes he'd ever made in his life. I am a on a drug addict's list of regrets. FML

#485057
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59504) - you deserved it (13834)

On 03/20/2009 at 4:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was leading a wheelchair fundraiser to raise money to make public areas wheelchair accessible. I had several guest speakers, all of which were confined to wheelchairs. About ten minutes after the fundraiser was supposed to begin, I realized that the stage was wheelchair incompatible. FML

#621759
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14969) - you deserved it (72226)

On 03/26/2009 at 1:40pm - work - by hated (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my daughter's school was putting on a fashion show for charity and all the kids were supposed to ask their mothers to be in it. I asked my daughter about it and she said "well I was going to ask you, but they said only to 'ask all of your BEAUTIFUL mommies." FML

#873134
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68065) - you deserved it (3583)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:08pm - kids - by livay315 (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was in the dressing room of my favorite store. While looking in the mirror at a shirt I really like, the fire alarm went off. In a panic, I ran out of the store like everyone else. The sensor went off on my shirt and I was banned from the store for attempted theft. FML

#2009508
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54709) - you deserved it (4335)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my husband was leaving on a long business trip to Germany. As he's leaving, my daughter starts crying. 'Dont leave me with her !' she says. 'Take me with you !' FML

#2104254
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47970) - you deserved it (8214)

On 05/20/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a friend of mine told me that he knew I was into kinky sex, "like getting tied up." I just stared at him, spluttering simple question words and wondering how on earth he could possibly know that about me. I then realized that he had been joking. Too late. FML

#3684886
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43606) - you deserved it (18716)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by i.ask.you.how. (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was shaving and I sneezed unexpectedly. I ended up cutting myself so badly that I had to go to the emergency room. It wouldn't have been quite so humiliating if I hadn't been forced to show the extremely attractive doctor my sliced open and half shaved crotch. FML

#5248876
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24155) - you deserved it (4610)

On 09/14/2009 at 8:58am - intimacy - by Humiliated (woman) - United States

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

#4548386
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43054) - you deserved it (2828)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:58pm - misc - by iltdtsm - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had been working at the checkout for over 5 hours. Slighty tired while serving a customer, my eye accidentally twitched and I gave him a wink, he smiled and winked back. When I finished work 2 hours later he was outside, waiting for me, and followed me to my car, still smiling. FML

#5017787
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47948) - you deserved it (3740)

On 09/03/2009 at 9:27am - work - by Pop_Pies (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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