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Today, it was my grandfather's burial. As the family was about to leave, a great aunt came up to my skinny, tall and pretty cousin and told her, "Stay beautiful and kind." Then, she walked to me and said, "And you, Stay kind." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26106) - you deserved it (2591)
On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by kthx (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I arrived at work and was immediately given a disciplinary write-up for being two hours late for my shift. Apparently the manager had changed my schedule that morning and failed to tell me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23135) - you deserved it (1141)
On 10/27/2009 at 12:04am - work - by hatemyjob (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went on a first date with an employee from Sobey's who asked for my number while I was grocery shopping. We decided to each bring a friend. I brought my roommate. He brought his girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23227) - you deserved it (2548)
On 10/29/2009 at 12:11am - love - by lds124 (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I wasn't feeling too well. I decided to bring my laptop with me to the bathroom, because I figured I would be in there for a while. Things were going great, until I felt a burp coming. Next thing I know, my computer is covered with puke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7301) - you deserved it (24860)
On 11/15/2009 at 10:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, me, a coworker, and my manager were looking at random advertisements. One ad was a picture of three fishes. My coworker named the three fishes what I thought were completely random names. I said "those are stupid names." Turns out those are my manager's kid's names. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5867) - you deserved it (22418)
On 11/17/2009 at 10:43pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, a man stopped me to tell me I was the most beautiful woman he'd seen all day. He promptly followed that up with: "Then again, you are the only woman I've seen today, so, it can only go up from here." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23586) - you deserved it (2068)
On 11/25/2009 at 3:26pm - misc - by saywhatnow (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I tried to send my boyfriend a sexy picture. I took a close up picture of my face, and, trying to be sexy, had my naked body reflected on a mirror in the background. First thing he says: "Who the hell is that guy in the background?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14393) - you deserved it (5017)
On 12/04/2009 at 7:48am - intimacy - by Not-so-sexy - United States (Washington)
Today, I walked in on my mom and dad. It wasn't my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21991) - you deserved it (2052)
On 12/27/2009 at 7:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20435) - you deserved it (4002)
On 12/10/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)
Today, I was texting this guy that I hooked up with yesterday. We were gonna do it again but he had basketball practice. I was talking to my friend about it, and sent her a text saying "Oh well. I have explosive diarrhea anyways." She wasn't replying, so I checked my sent box. I sent it to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5888) - you deserved it (12819)
On 01/08/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by weeble_wobbles09 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my wife and I were getting intimate. I wanted to make it last longer, so I tried thinking of something else. Suddenly she says, "What are you thinking?" I reply, "Dead puppies." This apparently turned her off more than it did me, because she got out of the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3237) - you deserved it (16134)
On 12/10/2009 at 9:22pm - intimacy - by jlowder2 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was at a party, chatting up this guy while we were petting my friends dog. The dog had just been outside and was kinda wet, I assumed it was raining out. Just then someone came up and said "Um, that dog's covered in pee." Apparently someone peed off the deck onto the dog as it walked by. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16786) - you deserved it (1796)
On 01/01/2010 at 11:40pm - animals - by ninjapup (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, our airplane was delayed because of issues with the de-ice-ing. Then, because it had too little fuel. Then, because of engine troubles. Then, because our first officer needed to be replaced due to legal restrictions on pilots' hours. Now, I get to go straight from the plane to work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18227) - you deserved it (1371)
On 01/02/2010 at 12:33am - work - by JSterl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 17 June 2013
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