Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend elbowed me in the eye while we were sleeping. His excuse: "You shouldn't have stayed over." FML

#13612970
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24847) - you deserved it (5111)

On 10/27/2010 at 8:36am - love - by me - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was told that I look like a cross between Roger Federer and Neil Patrick Harris. Apparently I have a big forehead and a squished face. FML

#13762185
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18734) - you deserved it (2931)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:32am - misc - by facingit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I finally quit my job after talking with a friend about making our own design/multimedia company. While I was on my way to his house, he called me and told me not to quit because he got an awesome job offer and couldn't refuse. FML

#13157564
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24524) - you deserved it (6993)

On 09/22/2010 at 3:22pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Chile (Region Metropolitana)

Today, I returned a friends jacket after borrowing it. I made sure to wash it and keep it clean. When he went to put it on, a pair of my granny panties fell out of the sleeve. FML

#13388494
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22768) - you deserved it (6747)

On 10/10/2010 at 2:54am - misc - by ewwy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while working as a carhop at Sonic, my roller skates ran over some gravel and I fell, causing me to drop a tray of food. I found out later that one of the customers had deliberately done that to see if I would trip. FML

#13925294
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29672) - you deserved it (2392)

On 11/21/2010 at 1:44pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my fiancé suggested we bring his elderly mother with us on our honeymoon. FML

#14422998
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34007) - you deserved it (3063)

On 01/01/2011 at 8:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized I was happy because we finally started having friends come visit us after months of not having company. I also realized that our secret stash of money was stolen last night while we had company. FML

#13439777
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23446) - you deserved it (3874)

On 10/13/2010 at 10:25pm - money - by robbed (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my friends were acting strange around me. This afternoon, I got a text asking me to meet them out for a couple of drinks. Because of all the strange acting, I decided to tell them I'd go and then not go. I just found out they had been planning me a surprise party. FML

#14627617
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7573) - you deserved it (45760)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:53pm - misc - by slondons (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I called my boss and said "I have been awake since 3am throwing up." He replied with "Great, see you at 9" and hung up. FML

#14638505
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29594) - you deserved it (2941)

On 01/19/2011 at 12:31pm - work - by gb739 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was applying for a job at a corporate office. Everything went fine until I hurled all over the manager, who until then seemed to like me. Never eat expired canned tuna on the same day as an interview. FML

#14548821
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7101) - you deserved it (29257)

On 01/11/2011 at 9:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found a picture my husband had saved on the computer. It was of me, and he had named it "Fatter". FML

#15075025
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22210) - you deserved it (11676)

On 02/22/2011 at 3:38am - love - by just great... -

Today, I thought it would be funny to scare my dad for once, since he has scared me for fun dozens of times. It would have been funny, had he not punched me in the face. FML

#19244225
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21504) - you deserved it (6619)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:10am - misc - by stupidprankster - United States

Today, I put signs up in the lifts at work with my name and desk phone number as the contact in case the lifts break down. I work in IT so there are hundreds of men in the building. Someone has already drawn a very wonky heart next to my name. FML

#15349045
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18796) - you deserved it (4833)

On 03/17/2011 at 6:00am - work - by Peppermint (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: