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Today, while driving and singing, I noticed a large fly inside my car. I stopped singing so it wouldn't fly into my mouth. That didn't stop it from flying up my nose, causing me to swerve and drive into a ditch. FML

#18262782
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27974) - you deserved it (4317)

On 11/16/2011 at 8:47am - misc - by jdancerchick - United States

Today, I was addressed by name by the liquor store clerk. I've never told him my name. He's just seen my ID many times. FML

#18837494
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8014) - you deserved it (27295)

On 01/17/2012 at 7:21pm - health - by Matchtopia - United States (Kansas)

Today, while driving home, I realized I forgot my house key. Luckily, when I arrived home, someone had already broken into my house. Guess I didn't need the key. FML

#19486401
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22571) - you deserved it (1733)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:55pm - misc - by yuuupyup - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I checked over the pictures on my night-cam to see if my cats are really going on our kitchen counters. As soon as I'd seen the first picture, I realized that this whole time my cats haven't been going on it. It was a rat. FML

#19004076
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24525) - you deserved it (2290)

On 02/05/2012 at 8:13pm - animals - by rattrap (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, on my first day of a new factory job, I discovered that my new boss had lied to me about my hours. I found this out when my coworkers burst out laughing when I mentioned having the weekends off, and talking about my recreational plans. FML

#19508407
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22214) - you deserved it (2189)

On 04/21/2012 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to McDonalds and ordered a happy meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML

#19401139
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39613) - you deserved it (4564)

On 04/03/2012 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I fell asleep during a job interview as it was taking place over the phone. FML

#19552616
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7874) - you deserved it (25400)

On 04/30/2012 at 9:28am - work - by jobless (woman) - United States

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML

#19720849
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25513) - you deserved it (6815)

On 06/02/2012 at 12:55pm - love - by Norwegian (man) - Norway

Today, it was the first time I was going to fly first class. I ended up in the bathroom almost the whole flight with diarrhea. FML

#19650597
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22432) - you deserved it (1918)

On 05/20/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I noticed the only time my husband stops snoring like a drunken horse is so that he can fart. FML

#19620502
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19066) - you deserved it (2052)

On 05/14/2012 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I'm so broke, I asked my parents if they'd pay for me to go to the eye doctor and consider it my Christmas present. FML

#20149436
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22009) - you deserved it (1957)

On 11/05/2012 at 8:01pm - money - by EB - United States

Today, I bumped into a man on the street. I apologized and he picked up his wallet. To clear the awkward silence, I pointed out that his wallet looked like mine. It wasn't until I was on the next street that I realized it was my wallet. FML

#19903103
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24306) - you deserved it (9550)

On 07/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Aaron Lewis - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

#19771597
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23356) - you deserved it (2329)

On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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