Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to take two buses home from a friend's house. After waiting in the cold for the second bus for 40 minutes, it finally came and I realized that I'd left my wallet on the first bus. It took me 2 hours to walk home and I was locked out because my house key is attached to my wallet. FML

#18541076
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (6946)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:25am - misc - by Kayla (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my parents came to visit me. I bought boxers and cologne to make it look like I had a man here. I've been single since I moved away. FML

#17866876
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10832) - you deserved it (24689)

On 09/29/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

#17506977
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20838) - you deserved it (3853)

On 08/18/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by upset room mate - United States (Texas)

Today, I found my "lost" bicycle in my best friend's garage. I've been having to catch two buses to get to work for the past few months. FML

#18029940
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23726) - you deserved it (2557)

On 10/20/2011 at 7:51am - misc - by jwhizzle - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while trying to get my phone to charge, I shoved in the cable harder and harder and tried to wobble it so my phone would charge. After snapping the USB input from the force, I saw the plug was switched off. FML

#18106914
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6233) - you deserved it (38293)

On 10/29/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Poole)

Today, I got stuck driving behind a rather large motorcyclist on a one way road for 30 miles. For those 30 miles, I had a full view of his back fat rolls and butt crack. FML

#18466137
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22654) - you deserved it (3277)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by O__o (woman) - United States

Today, I told a customer that we don't do refunds. He responded by throwing his wallet at my face and accusing me of stealing it. FML

#19187266
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24798) - you deserved it (2108)

On 02/29/2012 at 2:47am - work - by wallets - United States

Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then asked me for money. FML

#19105006
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25658) - you deserved it (2136)

On 02/18/2012 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after weeks of sorting, inspecting, and waiting, my high school's yearbooks were distributed. I'd searched carefully for photo errors and was proud to say there were none. That is, until someone told me that a boy on the last page was flipping the camera the bird. FML

#19642956
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15781) - you deserved it (3989)

On 05/18/2012 at 5:50pm - misc - by ooh cat - United States (California)

Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML

#19764407
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23739) - you deserved it (4644)

On 06/10/2012 at 4:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

#20189474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20975) - you deserved it (3771)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I am exhausted and can barely move after being up all night taking care of my drunk and vomiting husband. He, on the other hand, feels much better and is bounding with energy. FML

#19800781
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20307) - you deserved it (2613)

On 06/17/2012 at 8:34am - health - by Shenza - United States (New York)

Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML

#20438400
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9078) - you deserved it (41272)

On 01/02/2013 at 10:01am - misc - by AmberHavoc - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: