Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I flew home from college to see my parents. Later I found the expensive painting and hand-made necklace I mailed to my mom for mother's day while taking out the trash. FML

#1877583
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59732) - you deserved it (2939)

On 05/12/2009 at 4:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after four years of anorexia and lots of recovery, my parents took me out to dinner with my counselor and whole family to celebrate my progress. I ended up eating something that made me vomit everything I ate. My parents now think I am bulmic and are sending me back to counseling. FML

#4116964
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50252) - you deserved it (4910)

On 07/28/2009 at 8:47pm - health - by nothungry (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was my court date for a car accident I was involved in back in July. I had spent months preparing a case to prove my innocence. I was scheduled to appear at 10:00 this morning. I woke up at 10:15AM. FML

#5249828
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11750) - you deserved it (64330)

On 09/14/2009 at 11:17am - misc - by CWoah (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, in the middle of having sex with my boyfriend, instead of saying something sexy, he decided to tell me that the bowling alley had a new air hockey table. FML

#4585306
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40902) - you deserved it (5247)

On 08/16/2009 at 10:45pm - intimacy - by missingcharlie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was our wedding anniversary. My husband takes me and our young son to a family-style chain restaurant. Hoping for a little romance, I ask him what he's excited about in our future, and he says how we shouldn't eat out like this anymore so we can afford to pay our income taxes. FML

#5453638
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27975) - you deserved it (3983)

On 09/24/2009 at 7:50pm - love - by frenchfrypotater (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told my roommate about a trick he had used by filling nail holes with toothpaste when he moved out. When I came home with putty to fill the holes, there were blue spots all over the walls. She had filled them with blue gel toothpaste. Now I get to repaint, too. FML

#4011609
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37290) - you deserved it (3551)

On 07/24/2009 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

#4440172
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50723) - you deserved it (7527)

On 08/11/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boss asked to use my phone since the company pays for it. A few hours later the same boss called me into his office to fire me. Apparently the company checks the phone records and found a call made on my cell to a sex line. My boss made that call and just fired me. FML

#5149100
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53816) - you deserved it (4312)

On 09/09/2009 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by Somessedup (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my wife to block the mail of her ex (because he was sending her romantic mails) or I would leave. She told me that I could leave. FML

Today, a friend jokingly asked who in my relationship wears the pants. My girlfriend replied, "I'm not sure, but I've got photos to prove I don't wear the skirt." FML

#4754202
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10133) - you deserved it (34483)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:54am - love - by Crossy (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I asked a woman where her beautiful accent was from. The woman stared at me for a while. Then her daughter told me that the reason her mother talked like that was because she had a stroke a few months ago. FML

#4627315
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50131) - you deserved it (9685)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:33pm - misc - by anonymus (man) - United States

Today, I got home from work, and saw a note on the counter my roomate left saying "Sorry about the basement." I then went into the basement, and found that it was flooded. My TV, Xbox360, mini-fridge, and couch were all destroyed. Good thing he tried to stop the leak with scotch tape. FML

#4856467
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46053) - you deserved it (2427)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:51am - misc - by buzzzzkill (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to this meditation center which my mom suggested to get mental peace as I have been hating my job and life for some time now. I drove for an hour and then walked around in scorching Indian sun for 2 hours trying to locate the damn place. I got lost and returned home angrier than ever. FML

#4758974
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31360) - you deserved it (6539)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:33pm - misc - by zboy_123 (man) - India (Haryana)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: