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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said I look too ugly when I cry to do it seriously in person. FML

#15061601
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32958) - you deserved it (4384)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:59am - love - by Jules (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the woman I'm currently dating used to be a man. FML

#14105227
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55452) - you deserved it (9398)

On 12/06/2010 at 7:24am - intimacy - by swindstorm -

Today, I played a volleyball game at my school. Not only did I miss the winning point, the ball hit my face in the process, which resulted in popping a big fat zit on my nose. FML

#13797230
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23907) - you deserved it (4706)

On 11/11/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by iharethissomuxh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 14 year-old son sent a broadcast on my blackberry saying ''I'm a young gay man looking for some fun!'' to all my contacts as a joke. What he didn't know was that it's my work phone. FML

#14284329
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35319) - you deserved it (5016)

On 12/21/2010 at 11:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boss called me Ashley. My name doesn't even start with an A. I even wear a name tag. You would think after nearly four years, your boss would remember your name. Every time he speaks to me, it's a different name. FML

#14793014
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27383) - you deserved it (3619)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:56am - misc - by LynzG -

Today, my boyfriend told me that he is homophobic. This wouldn't be such a big deal, if my mother wasn't a lesbian. He doesn't know this yet, and I'm afraid to tell him. FML

#16636156
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35636) - you deserved it (6167)

On 06/12/2011 at 11:20pm - love - by ash - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML

#14583588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21753) - you deserved it (3055)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm - animals - by inchetogb - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my dad asked if I'd help him clean the gutters. I was given the responsibility of holding the ladder while he went on the roof. All I heard was laughter before a year's worth of rotting vegetation landed on top of my head. FML

#18097462
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23049) - you deserved it (2525)

On 10/28/2011 at 4:59pm - misc - by Weldingtags (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the nicest thing said to me all day was from my microwave that flashes 'enjoy your meal' when it finishes cooking something. FML

#14872504
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25597) - you deserved it (3324)

On 02/06/2011 at 9:05pm - misc - by bymyself -

Today, I had to say a deep sincere speech on assembly in front of the whole college on the recent floods in Queensland. Instead of saying "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked down, we get back up" I stumbled and said "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked up..." FML

#14955140
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24279) - you deserved it (4926)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by knockedup (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML

#15392529
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33115) - you deserved it (9522)

On 03/20/2011 at 12:26am - kids - by embarassed - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at the mall and I saw a kid crying. I asked her "What's wrong sweetie, are you lost?" She ran away screaming "Help me!" I ended up having to explain to a dumb mall cop that I'm not a perv. FML

#15281429
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28310) - you deserved it (3410)

On 03/12/2011 at 2:18am - misc - by soul0eater (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I was jogging when a woman ran out of her house and handed me an invitation for a party. What was the invitation for? A weight loss treatment party. Guess the jogging isn't working. FML

#18362103
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23918) - you deserved it (2760)

On 11/27/2011 at 12:30am - health - by jogger (woman) - United States (California)



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