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Today, an old friend of mine landed in Spain, where he's visiting me. After a few minutes talking about where we should meet, we realized the reason he couldn't figure out where it was, was probably due to the fact that he was in Barcelona. I live in Madrid. FML

#21371100
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31469) - you deserved it (4048)

On 03/09/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Spain (Aragon)

Today, I got a 'Good Morning' text from my boyfriend. Since I hadn't gotten one of those in a while, I thought it was rather nice. That is, until I saw the picture that accompanied it. It was of him, sitting on the toilet and taking a shit. FML

#21390594
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26952) - you deserved it (3220)

On 04/09/2015 at 11:10am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she'd leave me for her ex in a heartbeat. Tomorrow is, or should I say "was", our wedding day. FML

#21399347
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33427) - you deserved it (1957)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

#21403720
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21020) - you deserved it (3296)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland

Today, and as for the rest of my life, I will always have a husband whose breath stinks. FML

#451
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15531) - you deserved it (24451)

On 12/04/2008 at 11:40pm - love - by nothisfault - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother was vacuuming my room and found a towel under my bed. She asked "why does it smell so bad?" I replied "sweat". FML

#672
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12795) - you deserved it (32836)

On 01/01/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML

#1389
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33976) - you deserved it (2457)

On 01/16/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Ohai - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was gay and that he is in love with my younger brother. FML

#1554
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42471) - you deserved it (2418)

On 01/18/2009 at 7:41am - love - by Wenny - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she had fantasies about throwing him out a window when he was a baby because she was so depressed and couldn't handle the stress. The worst part is he wants to get married. She'd be my mother-in-law. FML

#1751
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19197) - you deserved it (3439)

On 01/19/2009 at 12:59pm - love - by lovekills99 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was with the guy I am seeing and I were fooling around in my room. I asked him if he wanted to have sex. He said he didn't have time because he had to go play Mario Kart. FML

#4196
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42105) - you deserved it (5825)

On 01/31/2009 at 3:01pm - intimacy - by Yoshi - United States (California)

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

#8842
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21235) - you deserved it (4190)

On 02/04/2009 at 8:18pm - misc - by Michigan (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

#9438
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46281) - you deserved it (13969)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:23am - animals - by #201 (woman) - United States (Florida)



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