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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went to the doctor's office for a minor cold, and left with a diagnosis of pregnancy. FML

#13998291
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24296) - you deserved it (10311)

On 11/27/2010 at 10:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my car alarm went off so I went outside to investigate. Apparently, the abundant rain water in my street had swept a trash can five houses down, only to be stopped by my car. My bumper was dented by a run-away waste receptacle. FML

#7837909
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16661) - you deserved it (1859)

On 02/03/2010 at 1:27am - misc - by rainey (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. A pretty redhead came on the screen. One of my guy friends leaned over to me and said, "Have you noticed there aren't any pretty redheads in real life?" I guess he forgot what color my hair is. FML

#8516526
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25022) - you deserved it (2536)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Mika_Ookami - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out my mom pretended to be me and had AIM conversations with my boyfriend. FML

#7957934
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29664) - you deserved it (2410)

On 02/07/2010 at 12:15am - love - by nekoneko (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I received a marriage proposal at work from a 70 year old man covered in dirt from head to toe, who offered to be my "sugar daddy." I guess I have options after all. FML

#13742971
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19178) - you deserved it (1960)

On 11/06/2010 at 8:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to send him a pic of myself being happy for his phone's caller ID. So I picked out a picture where I'm grinning a big grin, clearly very happy like he asked. He replies back, "You look weird there. Send a pretty one." FML

#8507501
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17692) - you deserved it (3978)

On 02/21/2010 at 3:44am - misc - by weirdo - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to pick me up and throw me on the bed. I rolled off and broke my collarbone. FML

#14139817
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27193) - you deserved it (2803)

On 12/09/2010 at 4:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He says "yeah well you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

#8938160
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27848) - you deserved it (3419)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:04am - love - by fu2then (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML

#12198220
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12331) - you deserved it (31113)

On 07/30/2010 at 12:26am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I finally got a job interview, and I thought it went amazing. They were supposed to call me today or tomorrow with the news. Today is also the day that my phone company decided to cut my phone off. FML

#10648270
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28361) - you deserved it (4683)

On 05/20/2010 at 12:58pm - work - by goodtiming (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I called my dad at his new wife's house to inform him I was all set to graduate from community college with my associates degree and that we needed to sit down and plan how to pay for the 4 year degree. To which he replied "all a girl needs is an associates degree". Thanks dad. FML

#9182520
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24114) - you deserved it (3869)

On 03/18/2010 at 8:20am - money - by Anna (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at volleyball tryouts when I accidentally spiked the ball into the fire alarm. The fire fighters did not look happy when they found out what had happened. So much for being on the team. FML

#13187772
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18554) - you deserved it (3049)

On 09/24/2010 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered my former boss from the job I quit 3 months is now my boss at my new job. He was the reason I quit my old job. FML

#11602306
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38867) - you deserved it (2616)

On 07/02/2010 at 12:21am - work - by lmao4eva93 - United States (North Carolina)



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