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Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML

#15238370
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33331) - you deserved it (3918)

On 03/08/2011 at 6:32am - animals - by ghoul -

Today, I wore my expensive new white jacket to work, thinking it would be a nice change from my usual black. I managed to lean in printer ink. FML

#16771657
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26380) - you deserved it (11935)

On 06/20/2011 at 10:33pm - misc - by drycleanplz - Reserved

Today, I blacked out at a wedding as a bridesmaid, during the service. FML

#19550881
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20149) - you deserved it (3589)

On 04/29/2012 at 10:53pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, trying to make a good impression and be helpful, I volunteered to look after my manager's cat while she moves house. The cat hasn't stopped meowing since he got here this evening, it's now 4 am and I have work in the morning. FML

#17064042
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22726) - you deserved it (6169)

On 07/11/2011 at 6:53am - work - by leahneedssleep (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by a "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. And we continued to chat. FML

#16575897
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33055) - you deserved it (6885)

On 06/09/2011 at 9:22am - health - by IPityTheStool (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I can't attend an interview for a great job because I have an exam. An exam I need to pass in order to have a great job like the one I'm missing the interview for. FML

#16039154
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30077) - you deserved it (3603)

On 05/03/2011 at 11:24pm - work - by Username -

Today, I had to pay a $150 late fee because my landlord didn't receive the rent check. My boyfriend had addressed the envelope to himself and put the landlord's as the return address. FML

#17379762
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24847) - you deserved it (3677)

On 08/05/2011 at 5:41pm - money - by sunflower226 - United States

Today, I got dressed up for the first time in days to go have sushi with a friend. When I walked out to my car, I noticed that the passenger window was shattered and the car robbed. What's worse is I'd forgotten to lock the side doors anyway. FML

#15788112
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24001) - you deserved it (5455)

On 04/14/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by markyvilla - United States

Today, my neighbor and I learned why fireworks are illegal in city limits. This lesson was learned shortly after a roman candle came crashing through my second story window. FML

#16980502
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23673) - you deserved it (7386)

On 07/05/2011 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was woken up to my mother screaming obscenities at me, all because I threw up last night after days of not feeling well, and the flushing of the toilet afterwards woke her up. FML

#18631126
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28017) - you deserved it (1851)

On 12/28/2011 at 1:32am - health - by loveurlifejk - United States

Today, after handing in my resume to get a part-time job, I tried leaving, but the door wouldn't open. It was the "in" door. The person I gave my resume to had to slowly explain this to me. FML

#19138758
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8910) - you deserved it (23374)

On 02/22/2012 at 1:10pm - work - by nevergettingajob (man) - Canada

Today, I explained to my 5 year old daughter that her older sister from my husband's first marriage lives with her mommy, and my daughter lives with us. She exclaimed, "It's not fair! I want two mommies like she has! Can we swap, I like her mommy better than you anyway!" FML

#16725685
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37803) - you deserved it (4647)

On 06/18/2011 at 5:40am - kids - by stepmom (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I learned that if you stare down an attractive man while pumping gas, he'll stare back. Then he might ask for your number. At which point his girlfriend will get out of the car and threaten to kick your ass. FML

#17413656
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28309) - you deserved it (11767)

On 08/09/2011 at 12:23am - misc - by **(: - United States (Kentucky)



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