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Today, I spent the whole day doing a 500 piece puzzle. The last piece didn't fit. FML

#21191359
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43240) - you deserved it (6162)

On 06/28/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Puzzlepiece - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to a first aid training course. I had to lie on the floor and pretend I was unconscious. We were supposed to be doing the recovery position, but the guy I was working with decided to perform CPR instead and grope my boobs in the process. FML

#21287010
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31955) - you deserved it (2914)

On 10/28/2014 at 2:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my psychotic step-dad asked me if I'm doing drugs. I replied with a massive amount of sarcasm: "Yeah, all of 'em. Especially meth." He flipped out, searched my room top to bottom, then grounded me "for good" until I tell him where I hid the supposed drugs. FML

#21233273
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41060) - you deserved it (12615)

On 08/09/2014 at 1:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

#21346882
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29924) - you deserved it (5198)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a potential customer was looking at a treadmill at the fitness warehouse I work at. Once he was done testing it out, I asked him if he'd like me to order it for him. His reply? "Nah. I only had a go on it 'cause it looked like fun. Hey, but you could order one for yourself, huh, chubs?" FML

#21236566
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37989) - you deserved it (4556)

On 08/13/2014 at 10:18am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I was locked out of my house. As I was about to knock on the window to ask my girlfriend to let me in, I saw her on the sofa, digging a huge booger out of her nose and eating it. FML

#21307507
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32998) - you deserved it (4294)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, a day after being informed that keeping my wallet in my front pocket was "strange", my wallet was stolen from my back pocket. FML

Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML

#21209168
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41378) - you deserved it (3414)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:04pm - work - by AFH2O - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend sent Christmas Carollers to my house to tell me he was breaking up with me. FML

Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hope whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch". Okay then. FML

#21345551
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28457) - you deserved it (2230)

On 01/28/2015 at 10:01am - work - by retailshell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, as I was saying bye to my girlfriend, I said "see ya later, alligator." She took offense because she thought I called her ugly. FML

#21321170
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30270) - you deserved it (3666)

On 12/20/2014 at 10:37pm - love - by sexualpopcorn - United States (California)

Today, I replied to a party invite. I thought I was only replying to the hostess, who's a close friend, so added a P. S. about a recent sex toy purchase I'd made and how rubbish it had been. I only realised after pressing "Send" that I'd selected "Reply All". FML

#21271313
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23763) - you deserved it (34905)

On 10/05/2014 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44494) - you deserved it (4593)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)



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