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Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML

#21281374
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32310) - you deserved it (3038)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:20pm - kids - by team hit bella with a car (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while working my shift at the grocery store, we ran out of muffins. I'm a little overweight, and I guess that's the reason an irate customer accused me of eating all of them. FML

#21233183
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40326) - you deserved it (3868)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:50am - work - by muffins - United States (Maryland)

Today, I gave birth to my first child. The first thing my husband says? "When can I hit it again, doc?" FML

#21280942
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36485) - you deserved it (4788)

On 10/19/2014 at 7:22am - kids - by how about never? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at the beach, I noticed a plastic bag in the water. I wanted to do something good for a change, help protect the environment and get it out. It wasn't a bag; it was a jellyfish. FML

#21236316
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39478) - you deserved it (8432) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2014 at 12:28am - animals - by Muwz - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was waiting in line at the check out, some guy came up behind me, plucked a hair out of my head, and ran off with it. FML

#21295452
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32909) - you deserved it (2788)

On 11/09/2014 at 1:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I attended an assembly regarding senior graduation. The assistant principal told us to look to the left and right of us, because those people would be our friends for the rest of our lives. I was the only one in the entire row. FML

#21273575
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39717) - you deserved it (4017)

On 10/08/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by allergic_to_bull (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my cat tunneled her way under the covers to sleep beside me. It was really cute until she panicked in the middle of the night and practically skinned me alive trying to find her way out. FML

Today, my mom wouldn't let me go to the YMCA pool with the rest of the family. She said that the sound my thighs make when they rub together is "embarrassing". FML

#21317143
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35630) - you deserved it (4343)

On 12/14/2014 at 2:07am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out the person who's been stalking and harassing me online was actually my now ex-boyfriend. He only confessed as I finally picked up the phone to report it to the police. He basically said he wanted me to turn to him for comfort and protection, so he could "feel like a man". FML

#21323138
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30758) - you deserved it (2333)

On 12/24/2014 at 7:03am - misc - by jflac (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my brother and I woke up early to get a sneak peek at our Christmas presents. We found our parents having sex on the couch. FML

#21323779
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34599) - you deserved it (13465)

On 12/25/2014 at 4:13am - intimacy - by VCDUDE11FTW - United States (Ohio)

Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML

#21343273
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30692) - you deserved it (4658)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my boyfriend was on a dating website. He came up as an ideal match for my sister. FML

#21333814
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32112) - you deserved it (2514)

On 01/09/2015 at 7:06am - love - by ohdearyme - United Kingdom (Surrey)



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Friday 26 June 2015

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