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Today, I was grounded by my mom because I had slept in past 11, when she wanted me to wake up at seven to do chores. According to her logic, I should have seen the note she left on the counter earlier this morning. FML

#19545380
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27039) - you deserved it (2679)

On 04/28/2012 at 11:55pm - misc - by thyisnothorses - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a full on "conversation" with my cat about her laying off the catnip. I really need to get out more. FML

#16138835
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11723) - you deserved it (24490)

On 05/12/2011 at 12:41am - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, it's my birthday. Out of loneliness, I went to order some flowers and a cake "for a friend". The guy who delivered it to my house was the same guy from the counter. FML

#17271800
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31083) - you deserved it (11820)

On 07/26/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by anon - Israel

Today, I found out my marriage counselor is currently going through her second divorce. FML

#19330413
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21943) - you deserved it (2121)

On 03/23/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by badadvise (man) - Mexico (Jalisco)

Today, the recycling bin caught fire. My little brother was "experimenting" with his magnifying glass, set an egg carton on fire and didn't realise you had to put it out before throwing it in the bin. FML

#18354691
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20760) - you deserved it (2061)

On 11/26/2011 at 6:38am - kids - by Annon - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML

#18368506
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22206) - you deserved it (3090)

On 11/27/2011 at 5:46pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, a guy lost control of his umbrella in the wind, which then hit me in the eye, making me bleed. He screamed at me for trying to steal his umbrella. People laughed. FML

#18386574
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31974) - you deserved it (1889)

On 11/29/2011 at 6:59pm - misc - by anon - United Kingdom (London)

Today, as I was training a new guy at work, my husband spent half the day creeping outside in his truck. FML

#17868574
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22322) - you deserved it (3030)

On 09/30/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Cristie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was not yet wearing my bouncer uniform when a fight broke out at a club. I intervened, only to have the cops who showed up tase me because they thought I was part of it. FML

#19353440
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22845) - you deserved it (4133)

On 03/26/2012 at 8:17pm - work - by ramis182 - United States (Washington)

Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML

#19673015
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17664) - you deserved it (3382)

On 05/24/2012 at 2:26pm - work - by thwack - United States

Today, I walked into two things. The first was a spiderweb. The second, due to blind panic, was oncoming traffic. FML

#19072252
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21837) - you deserved it (4968)

On 02/14/2012 at 7:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I started a new job. I noticed all the beautiful women. Then I tripped on a cord running across the floor. They noticed me too. FML

#19605681
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16699) - you deserved it (5109)

On 05/11/2012 at 1:03am - work - by Brown345 (man) - United States

Today, after 5 months of unemployment and hardcore job searching, I got hired for my dream job. I called my mum to tell her all about it, to which she responded, "Great honey! Now all you need to do is lose all that weight". She allowed me all of 4 minutes of feeling good about myself. FML

#19676513
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20483) - you deserved it (2544)

On 05/25/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by daddyowl - Canada (Quebec)



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