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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was online and I saw a friend that I hadn't talked to in two years come online. I IM'ed him, only for him to respond, "I haven't responded to any messages of yours in over a year. Most people would get the hint." FML

#14062616
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24258) - you deserved it (7457)

On 12/02/2010 at 6:43pm - misc - by wingless_angel_7 (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my mother called to uninvite me from Christmas, my ex-wife is going and she doesn't want it to be awkward for her. FML

#14170475
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36363) - you deserved it (2487)

On 12/11/2010 at 8:55pm - misc - by kingkarnie - United States

Today, I discovered my water bottle had leaked and spilled water all over my backpack, ruining my notebooks, soaking my schoolbooks, and destroying my midterm portfolio. FML

#8970857
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25675) - you deserved it (5204)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53786) - you deserved it (4534) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, I noticed a picture in an elderly patients room, of a pretty girl in a bikini. Trying to be funny and lighten the mood, I said, "Looks like you have some good eye candy to help you recover faster." With a stern look he replied, "That's my granddaughter." FML

#13927206
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8026) - you deserved it (30823)

On 11/21/2010 at 5:36pm - work - by BlackRavenWings - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I saw a car on the side on the highway with a popped tire. The driver didn't have a spare, so I nicely gave them mine. One hour later my tire popped. FML

#12895675
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35145) - you deserved it (7187)

On 09/04/2010 at 1:15am - love - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to listen to my mother flirting on the phone with my dad's new girlfriend's ex-husband. FML

#13109561
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27202) - you deserved it (2483)

On 09/19/2010 at 3:31am - love - by messyfamily (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I figured out why the man I've been seeing for 3 years hasn't asked for my hand in marriage. His current wife called me and told me all about it. FML

#14399805
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31945) - you deserved it (3709)

On 12/30/2010 at 7:45pm - love - by 3yrneveragainn -

Today, I woke up with a migrane, so I took one of my prescription migrane pills to get me through my day. The pill made me dizzy and nauseous, so I took a motion-sickness pill. That pill gave me a migrane. FML

#14851350
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27536) - you deserved it (4923)

On 02/05/2011 at 11:13am - health - by Screwed in Seattle - United States (California)

Today, during dinner, my family had a discussion about the color of poop. FML

#14984577
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26857) - you deserved it (4169)

On 02/15/2011 at 12:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, one of my boyfriend's friends ranted on about how I am such a crappy girlfriend and how all of his friends don't like me. I just spent over $200 on a surprise party that I invited them all to last weekend. FML

#14597219
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25435) - you deserved it (3116)

On 01/16/2011 at 1:50am - misc - by me - United States (Georgia)

Today, I noticed a woman struggling to work a parking meter, so I went over to help. She took one look at me before screaming, hitting me in the face, and running back to her car. FML

#17030177
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27387) - you deserved it (3301)

On 07/08/2011 at 4:02pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, while presenting a project I've worked on for months, one of the professors exasperatedly cut in mid-sentence, saying, "Look, it's shit. Just stop already." FML

#14742599
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29409) - you deserved it (4154)

On 01/28/2011 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Slovakia (Bratislava)



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