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Today, my girlfriend and I were role playing when her mum walked past the slightly open door, saw me, and chased me out of the house for stealing her baby's innocence. I was only wearing a red speedo. FML

#12775979
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13479) - you deserved it (36240)

On 08/27/2010 at 7:16pm - intimacy - by yeah - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got into a car accident. While getting my things out of the car to bring into the tow truck, I noticed the handcuffs from my Halloween costume were still in the trunk. The tow truck driver noticed before I did, because he smiled, winked, and asked if I needed any more help. FML

#13665915
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23922) - you deserved it (5034)

On 10/31/2010 at 5:27pm - intimacy - by jo1429 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the reason my best friend is not allowed over anymore is because he hits on my mom and writes her love letters. FML

#13259037
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31619) - you deserved it (2485)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:11am - misc - by Bestfrienduncool - Sent from mobile version

Today, my friends and I rented a party bus, which broke down on the highway 45 minutes into the ride. I paid the guy for the whole four hours. He said he was going to flag down a car to get someone to help us. We saw him get into a car and leave. FML

#17253464
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27927) - you deserved it (3085)

On 07/25/2011 at 12:08pm - money - by tim12345 - United States

Today, I was applying some acne ointment. The directions said, "Apply a thin layer, covering the entire affected area." In other words, for me: My entire face. Lovely. FML

#8988436
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21762) - you deserved it (3801)

On 03/11/2010 at 12:04am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I woke up to all 4 of my wheels stolen from my car. The thieves were kind enough to leave the car resting on wooden blocks and bricks. FML

#14347909
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24521) - you deserved it (2279)

On 12/26/2010 at 6:36pm - misc - by JennieA -

Today, I was upset after my boyfriend and I broke up. My best friend heard and told me she would be right over. Three hours of waiting later she stumbles in wasted. She had been at the bar, with my ex, making sure he was okay. For me, I just got a list of all the drinks she had that night. FML

#9004335
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24980) - you deserved it (2214)

On 03/11/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by dreadedmafia86 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30227) - you deserved it (3278)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML

#12492067
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35894) - you deserved it (3705)

On 08/13/2010 at 1:33am - love - by brother love - United Kingdom

Today, it was my big sister's birthday, and I was told the iPod I ordered her online was not coming due to a mix up. I drove to three different electronic stores before I found the one she wanted. After spending forever in traffic, I came home to find a package on my doorstep. It was her iPod. FML

#13670033
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28640) - you deserved it (3758)

On 11/01/2010 at 12:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I finally felt the effects of a laxative that I took last night. This morning, when I was in the dentist's chair. FML

#13960658
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24906) - you deserved it (6515)

On 11/24/2010 at 10:40am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML

#12316172
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28199) - you deserved it (2393)

On 08/04/2010 at 8:02pm - misc - by Amandajean32 - United States

Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML

#13799925
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7734) - you deserved it (40387)

On 11/11/2010 at 8:34am - intimacy - by Caught (woman) - United States (Florida)



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