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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML

#6591482
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30660) - you deserved it (2330)

On 12/03/2009 at 10:11pm - love - by holla1787 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I spent the day studying with one of my classmates whom I've just met. While studying, she kept bragging about her boyfriend and decided to show me a picture of him. It was my boyfriend. FML

#7372755
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39540) - you deserved it (2229)

On 01/16/2010 at 2:17am - misc - by shockedgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my new girlfriend was telling me how she's attracted to "All-American" looking guys. Tall, manly body, handsome face. Then she says, "But it's ok, you're cute too." FML

#6710252
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27160) - you deserved it (2666)

On 12/11/2009 at 4:24pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to take a urine test. I drank a lot of water so that I wouldn't force it. When I got there, I had to pee really bad. The cup was too small and when I relieved my bladder, it was a jet that rebounded off of the cup and overflowed going all over my hands, clothes, toilet, and floor. FML

#6805799
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12323) - you deserved it (22418)

On 12/18/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by Tib (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out that I have to work Christmas Day. There's no public transport running and taxis are triple fare. It'll cost me more getting to work than I'll actually earn during the shift. FML

#6917997
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26028) - you deserved it (1970)

On 12/24/2009 at 6:20am - work - by Barstaff (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I crossed a one-way street after looking for oncoming traffic only to be hit by a car driving in reverse. FML

#6975608
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31834) - you deserved it (4949)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:48pm - misc - by Davios - United States

Today, I decided to try whitening my teeth for the first time. I applied the strips to my teeth and decided to lay down and wait for the thirty required minutes to pass. I accidentally fell asleep and woke up three hours later. My teeth are still in excruciating pain and are covered in white streaks. FML

#6841945
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8969) - you deserved it (28933)

On 12/20/2009 at 2:52am - health - by nikko blue - United States (California)

Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slip. FML

#7135383
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5811) - you deserved it (29551)

On 01/03/2010 at 10:50pm - health - by fml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML

#7643965
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28610) - you deserved it (3371)

On 01/28/2010 at 3:12pm - work - by sucksssssss - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was saying goodbye to my 5 year old son before dropping him at my mom's, as I was leaving for two days, and told him I would miss him. He says "l won't miss you, I never miss you when you are gone." FML

#7294242
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30751) - you deserved it (3850)

On 01/12/2010 at 1:46am - kids - by mandiballz - United States (California)

Today, my mother urged me to "get over this lesbian thing and give me some grandkids." In front of my girlfriend of eleven months. FML

#7583250
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36305) - you deserved it (11834)

On 01/26/2010 at 1:05am - love - by Eagle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got out of the hospital for the second time in a week. The first time was for a seizure that my cat induced by tripping me over. The second was to get stitches from the Doberman that had decided to take over my front yard while I was gone. Apparently I was intruding. FML

#7512999
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21929) - you deserved it (2018)

On 01/23/2010 at 12:13am - health - by estallidos (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after spending a few minutes de-icing my car and leaving the heat on so it would warm up, I slipped as I was entering the car and hit my head on the door, causing it to close and lock. I'm waiting for my mom who has a spare key to come and unlock it. Class started ten minutes ago. FML

#7613862
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22348) - you deserved it (3338)

On 01/27/2010 at 3:03pm - misc - by katie - Sent from mobile version



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