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Today, I came home to found all of my belongings out on the street. My roommate, who is also my brother, apparantly neglected to pay his part of the rent, and we got evicted. FML

#3553379
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43489) - you deserved it (3554)

On 07/07/2009 at 1:00pm - money - by BrianP (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I recieved a phone call from a cruise line I had travelled on with my parents a year ago. After being told I had won a free $2,000 cruise from a sweepstakes I had entered while on the cruise. After celebrating loudly they informed me that you have to be 23 or older to collect it. I'm 17. FML

#3095885
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39167) - you deserved it (5470)

On 06/21/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by Lucky (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, on my break, I decided to be friendly and chat with a co-worker that everyone else always seems to avoid. He spent the next ten minutes telling me all about his abcessing sebaceous cysts. Apparently, "The scars look just like gunshot wounds." FML

#5707882
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25798) - you deserved it (5114)

On 10/07/2009 at 6:36pm - work - by loverofstrife (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it's my birthday. I'm a pastry chef by profession. Not only did my family buy a cake from my bakery, I had to make it myself and inscribe it with 'Happy Birthday Dad'. The worst part is, they asked money from me to pay for it. FML

#5181062
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41353) - you deserved it (2483)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by peter (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, I drove home in my brand new car, hoping to surprise my girlfriend. She came out the house laughing, saying how funny it was, and how I look like a "twollop" in it. Then in all seriousness, she asked me when I was getting my "actual car" back from the garage. FML

#1922061
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36253) - you deserved it (4601)

On 05/14/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by Badnewca (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my cat kept sneezing all morning so I took her to the vet. $150 later and the vet says she's fine. I get home and the noise starts up again. My automatic air freshener spray sounds just like my cat sneezing. FML

#2107196
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15472) - you deserved it (47325)

On 05/20/2009 at 5:07am - animals - by catlover (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML

#1881750
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43104) - you deserved it (11394)

On 05/12/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by getyourownbike (woman) - United States

Today, my grandparents were staying over my house for a couple of nights. As I was walking to my bathroom in the middle of the night, I noticed their door was open, and my grandfather was awake. I tried to say 'Hi' to him, but he didn't hear me. I then noticed that he was masturbating. FML

Today, I woke up happy because I'd met the man of my dreams at a bar. We had shared an amazing night together. I walked around my apartment, wondering where he'd went. Turns out, he was gone. So was my car. FML

#87157
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50155) - you deserved it (25205)

On 02/20/2009 at 10:38am - intimacy - by clueless2 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while out to lunch, my sister called me and asked me to pick her up from the mall. I told her she'd have to wait. She got pissed off and started cursing at me, so I hung up on her. She called me back 37 times until I answered and yelled "WILL YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?" It was my boss. FML

#227802
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19647) - you deserved it (47005)

On 03/06/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by jacks_smirking_revenge (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a party. Later I find out that while I was passed out two of my friends came in and had sex while I was in the same bed. They tried to use me as a prop. Now my friends call me the love wedge. FML

#245374
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66320) - you deserved it (21527)

On 03/08/2009 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by lovewedge (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I decided to introduce my girlfriend to my parents by telling them that we were gonna have a very special guest for dinner. While my mom was preparing the meal she asked, "What does he like?" I'm straight. My parents thought different. FML

#407714
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81762) - you deserved it (6766)

On 03/17/2009 at 3:25am - love - by isaacBENNETT (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was volunteering at a school, as I walked past the swings these two girls smiled and said "wow, you are so pretty!". I smiled back and said "awww, well thank you!." As I walked past I hear them laughing, "she actually believed us." FML

#737315
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53831) - you deserved it (4624)

On 03/31/2009 at 11:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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