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Today, the girl I like was panicking because her car broke down, so I offered her a lift to wherever she needed to be. I drove her to her boyfriend's house. She asked me to drive her home in the morning. FML

#6992183
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28865) - you deserved it (6528)

On 12/28/2009 at 12:17pm - love - by syco (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I was playing around on Photo Booth, using weird effects on pictures of myself. I clicked on one and thought to myself that it was a really ugly effect. Then I noticed that it was set on normal. FML

#7183018
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17912) - you deserved it (23708)

On 01/06/2010 at 4:05pm - misc - by ugly5402 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a completely improvised audition for the school play. The director called me and one of the cutest guys auditioning to improvise an intimate scene. Knowing that I'm a complete klutz, I wasn't all that surprised when I tripped over my feet and landed with my face in his crotch. He was. FML

#7582501
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24906) - you deserved it (3551)

On 01/26/2010 at 12:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML

#7515979
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8635) - you deserved it (24151)

On 01/23/2010 at 3:05am - intimacy - by BlackPolarbear - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out my boyfriends' mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

#7354557
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29641) - you deserved it (5083)

On 01/15/2010 at 6:37am - love - by Jumja (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my boss asked me if I could work on Valentine's Day because there was no chance of me having a date. She's right. FML

#8007090
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31908) - you deserved it (2920)

On 02/08/2010 at 9:07am - love - by klala - Reserved

Today, I was expecting a call from my friend. The phone rang and I answered with "WANK!!" as a joke. It wasn't my friend on the phone, it was my boss. FML

#10132808
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9138) - you deserved it (40187)

On 04/25/2010 at 6:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after spending the three previous nights cursing the noisiest bird alive that continually disrupts my sleep to the point where I just want to smash the damn thing's head in with a rock, I realised it's been my pedestal fan the entire time. FML

#13431909
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5630) - you deserved it (27307)

On 10/13/2010 at 7:58am - animals - by SoundConfuser - Australia (Queensland)

Today, at a concert, my friend grew tired of holding her bag. She asked a man to hold it, saying that he wouldn't steal it "since it was hers". I quietly told her she was too naïve and irresponsible. After the concert, I got home and noticed my wallet was stolen instead, right out of my pocket. FML

#14078966
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22804) - you deserved it (4706)

On 12/04/2010 at 12:37am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at basketball practice and my coach asked me how my knee was. When I lifted my pants to show him, my cheetah print thong that had been stuck inside the pants from the dryer flew out to the ground. FML

#7968028
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24731) - you deserved it (8115)

On 02/07/2010 at 9:21am - misc - by Mackdaddy (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out that my neighbor gets more pleasure out of me and my husband having it off then I do. FML

#8382778
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15723) - you deserved it (2204)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by noosher0990 -

Today, my mum was saying she needs to gain weight because she was underweight according to her doctor. She then said she's going to eat like me in order to gain more weight. FML

#8047035
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22358) - you deserved it (6591)

On 02/09/2010 at 9:26am - health - by mynameislor - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I noticed my house smells a lot like my grandma's. Not because we use the same cleaning products or anything like that, but because I'm slowly turning into a crazy cat lady. FML

#8420953
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7400) - you deserved it (20749)

On 02/18/2010 at 9:20pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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