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Today, I received a very expensive bottle of wine for Christmas. My alcoholic mother snuck into my house while I was out and drank the whole bottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20494) - you deserved it (1896)
Today, I woke up to the feeling of someone tickling my back. I quickly realized I haven't been touched in so long that I was smiling to flies landing on me in my sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18738) - you deserved it (2982)
On 09/12/2011 at 7:03pm - animals - by GnarCarBar - United States
Today, I pulled one of my favorite hoodies out of my closet, and immediately noticed several large stains on it. Apparently, my dad had managed to open a hole in the roof and couldn't be bothered to patch it, so a squirrel got in and used my closet as a litter box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16750) - you deserved it (1266)
On 09/19/2011 at 6:16am - animals - by gs - United States (New York)
Today, I got my score back for the monolog I performed. I got points taken off for "seeming nervous." My character was supposed to be nervous. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23025) - you deserved it (1630)
On 02/28/2012 at 2:38pm - misc - by Jessica - United States (Texas)
Today, my friend showed me a creepy piece of artwork he'd drawn. I laughed and said that it would give me nightmares, meaning it as a compliment. Turns out, this one was in honor of his dead grandmother, who'd raised him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14545) - you deserved it (6590)
On 01/25/2012 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17348) - you deserved it (1109)
Today, my friend posted my phone number all over the Internet, claiming I was a deranged stalker who prank called her. I was calling from my new number to give it to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12696) - you deserved it (941)
On 09/20/2012 at 9:39pm - misc - by Emily - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my parents changed the code on our alarm system while they were out of town. The police could not verify I was their son, despite spending hours trying to get hold of them. They thought it was just another telemarketer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13558) - you deserved it (722)
On 09/23/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15437) - you deserved it (1327)
On 09/21/2012 at 7:48am - love - by dateless (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16724) - you deserved it (797)
On 10/12/2012 at 7:00pm - misc - by WTF (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)
Today, I was going through Facebook photos of a pep rally in the hopes that I'd be in at least one of them. I was in one alright. Pulling out a wedgie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12735) - you deserved it (3565)
On 10/01/2012 at 8:50am - misc - by awks - United States (Virginia)
Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML
I agree, your life sucks (13630) - you deserved it (1278)
On 12/01/2012 at 3:35am - work - by CheddarJack89 (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15716) - you deserved it (872)
On 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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