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Today, I have an eight hour transatlantic flight and the person sitting next to me has already filled his third sick bag. This wouldn't be quite so bad were we not still at the terminal with passengers still boarding the plane. FML

#16714444
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31517) - you deserved it (2130)

On 06/17/2011 at 4:23pm - misc - by ajdown (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML

#17531478
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27519) - you deserved it (2230)

On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States

Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML

#16221973
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49529) - you deserved it (25931)

On 05/17/2011 at 1:34pm - money - by anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I tore up my airborne academy admission documents because my lab results weren't good enough. A few hours later, they called me to apologize for the misunderstanding, mine turned out to be perfect and they'd accepted me. They need me tomorrow with all the documents to finalize the admission. FML

#16263514
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15311) - you deserved it (37160)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:46am - work - by SkyDiver -

Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML

#18106898
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11457) - you deserved it (29229)

On 10/29/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Messiahman - United States (Texas)

Today, I made the long drive to work, got out of the car, and realised that I'd forgotten to put shoes on before I left the house. FML

#16715265
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14763) - you deserved it (29721)

On 06/17/2011 at 5:24pm - misc - by Hannah - Ireland (Sligo)

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML

Today, my boyfriend wrote a song for me. As he was singing it to me I realized it was actually a breakup song. FML

#19342330
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29456) - you deserved it (2306)

On 03/25/2012 at 12:40am - love - by lil123 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I played a Jazz gig. It rained, making the tent the band performed under heavy with water. When I stepped forward to play my solo, the front end of the tent collapsed under the weight of the rain, drenching me. FML

#17617354
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22322) - you deserved it (2195)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:56pm - misc - by TheJazzKid - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me with a message that I had to pay $1 to see. FML

#18856263
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26788) - you deserved it (3042)

On 01/19/2012 at 8:46pm - love - by Alejandroc - Honduras (Cortes)

Today, I was watching wrestling videos on YouTube, when my little brother walked in. Later, my little brother told my parents that I was watching naked men on my computer. They won't stop thinking that I was watching gay porn. FML

#18226728
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29630) - you deserved it (6792)

On 11/12/2011 at 9:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was driving my drunk mother home when my phone rang. It was my boyfriend, so I asked her to answer the call. My mother then questioned him on our sex life and was especially interested to know if we'd used handcuffs because I "like them." I have no recollection of ever telling her this. FML

#17702790
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28012) - you deserved it (4373)

On 09/09/2011 at 6:58am - intimacy - by psychicmother (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my students took my glasses, hid them from me, and called me a turtle when I squinted my eyes trying to look for them. This carried on for about 25 minutes. FML

#17980365
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26299) - you deserved it (3650)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:09am - kids - by TurtleTeacher (man) - United States (Alaska)



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