Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I got pulled over for going a few miles per hour over the speed limit. The cop asked for my license and registration. I happened to look down at my wallet while he was processing everything and saw my license in my wallet. I gave the cop my fake I.D. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5440) - you deserved it (51707)
On 09/18/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, as I was walking towards my friends at the bus stop, a man came up to me and asked me out. This was the first time I'd be asked out in months. I accepted. When I reached my friends they looked at me then asked, "Why were you talking to that homeless guy?". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26044) - you deserved it (12240)
On 05/15/2009 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I found out that the horrible stench haunting my apartment for the past week was the decomposing corpse of my freedom loving gerbil underneath the bed that I've been sleeping on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37132) - you deserved it (8137)
On 04/29/2009 at 12:52am - misc - by broomrape (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got a ticket. From my dad the cop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31536) - you deserved it (10754)
On 02/09/2009 at 10:59pm - misc - by annoyed (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was complaining to my mom about how my sister looked like a barbie doll next to me. I was saying how she was so tan and her hair looked awesome next to mine. She paused for a while and then said "Well you're pretty on the inside." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26283) - you deserved it (6194)
On 02/16/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by Dasani (woman) - United States (California)
Today, at Church, the little boy sitting behind me asked his mother if I had the chicken pox, because there were red dots all over my face. I've had bad acne since I was twelve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37887) - you deserved it (2688)
On 02/18/2009 at 5:09pm - kids - by Spotted (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54493) - you deserved it (12528)
On 02/27/2009 at 3:39am - intimacy - by facepalm (woman) - Singapore
Today, I accidentally dropped my phone in the toilet. I automatically dove my hand in and ran out of the stall with it. As I dried it, some girls were laughing. I assumed that they were laughing because my phone fell in the toilet. Then I noticed my pants were still down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15755) - you deserved it (29022)
On 04/03/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by tmac (woman) - United States
Today, I had to sing in a choir for Easter. Without making it even halfway across the stage, my high heel got caught on a cord that was supposed to be "taped down" causing me and 20 other people to collapse. Turns out it was a main power cord that left us in the dark for 10 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36390) - you deserved it (5003)
On 04/12/2009 at 10:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my family and I drove to a mall an hour away. We split up, and I went into a store by myself. A little later, I get a call from my brother asking me where I am. They had already left to go home and didn't notice me missing from the car. They were already halfway home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48289) - you deserved it (1914)
On 04/26/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by chippuh (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to the doctor. I had a spider bite that had been getting progressively larger for days. I had been putting Neosporin on underneath the bandage that was on it. The doctor saw my wound and laughed. He said the spider bite was no big deal, but that I was allergic to the Neosporin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42810) - you deserved it (7278)
On 05/11/2009 at 11:14am - health - by Manatee (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got a promotion to management at work. My employer decided to give the 'non-management' employees a really nice raise. Which means the job I had before my promotion is now paying more than the job I have now. Did I just get demoted? FML
I agree, your life sucks (33598) - you deserved it (1860)
On 09/13/2009 at 2:12am - work - by ofcourse (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, my boyfriend brought me to his place to meet his parents. When they saw me, they laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35125) - you deserved it (2740)
On 10/05/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by omfgmaya - Denmark (Vestsjalland)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
