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Saturday 10 May 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML

#21139954
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46379) - you deserved it (6796)

On 05/14/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by oh god. - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my brain-dead brother-in-law decided to play five finger fillet while at my place. Predictably, he ended up slicing a finger wide open. My mother-in-law now wants my blood, because she thinks I dared him to do it, and that clearly her perfect little angel couldn't be such a moron. FML

#21134881
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39278) - you deserved it (3512)

On 05/09/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by fmlgirl (woman) - Netherlands (Zeeland)

Today, my computer crashed and lost all of its data while I was making a back up. FML

#21134602
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41765) - you deserved it (3967)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:35am - misc - by mlowy - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, my parents decided to get with the times. So far, they've made me get Snapchat and Instagram accounts, and made me add them on Facebook. They keep acting like annoying teenagers, and get mad at me when I don't play along. For the love of god, somebody save me. FML

#21134960
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43992) - you deserved it (4987)

On 05/09/2014 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anais Strongrump III Jr. (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4am. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML

#21142655
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45871) - you deserved it (4558)

On 05/17/2014 at 6:11am - misc - by frustrated - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I love him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML

#21136683
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43707) - you deserved it (5212)

On 05/11/2014 at 1:57pm - love - by not gay in AL (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I jumped out of bed in panic and rushed into the bathroom, only to see my sister limping around in the nude. She'd just jumped out of the shower because someone had flushed the toilet downstairs. FML

#21135014
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37667) - you deserved it (4063)

On 05/09/2014 at 6:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - South Africa

Today, some thieves broke into my church and stole our cameras, monitors, and some other hardware. We were planning to use them for the security system we were about to install. FML

Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML

#21142181
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37428) - you deserved it (16031)

On 05/16/2014 at 7:20pm - misc - by Female Struggles (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML

#21133162
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37751) - you deserved it (9357)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:55am - misc - by Bad Artist - United States

Today, I found out my son has a new hobby after seeing a picture on the internet: putting realistic-looking stickers of spiders at the bottom of my coffee mugs. My wife was scared half to death this morning after downing a cup of coffee and then glancing the cup's bottom. FML

#21139841
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38954) - you deserved it (4588)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by itwasathtebottomofmycoffeemug (man) - United States (California)

Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML

#21135494
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37696) - you deserved it (3616)

On 05/10/2014 at 9:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML

#21136773
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44612) - you deserved it (3421)

On 05/11/2014 at 3:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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