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Saturday 10 May 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

#21134831
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49945) - you deserved it (4575)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:24pm - love - by WTTFFFF (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25803) - you deserved it (58189)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML

#21138864
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55273) - you deserved it (7369)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by taintedlover (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked outside to see my boyfriend standing on my porch, looking confused. He explained to me that he had attached a prom proposal note to his pet rabbit, and let it inside my house to find me. We went looking for said rabbit, and found my dog halfway through eating it. FML

#21136990
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56243) - you deserved it (5241)

On 05/11/2014 at 6:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

#21134608
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44439) - you deserved it (3838) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2014 at 4:48pm - animals - by gvmfvr - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom made a Facebook post about me starting my period and for everyone to be nice to me. FML

#21135508
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54468) - you deserved it (4750)

On 05/10/2014 at 9:35am - misc - by ColoredPencil13 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was hosting my daughter's thirteenth birthday party. One parent decided to stay at my house, the only parent to do so. The entire night she critiqued every decision I made, from the films to the cake. When it was time to open presents, her kid was the only one without one. FML

#21141320
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50911) - you deserved it (4210)

On 05/15/2014 at 11:15pm - kids - by madbirthdaymomma (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

#21135914
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44824) - you deserved it (13147)

On 05/10/2014 at 6:11pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML

#21143150
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48768) - you deserved it (3983)

On 05/17/2014 at 5:56pm - misc - by 2ndgenoration (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found out my neighbor collects body-bags. FML

#21139874
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42902) - you deserved it (3791)

On 05/14/2014 at 5:46pm - misc - by chellegbelle - United States (Washington)

Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML

#21142253
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42239) - you deserved it (14452)

On 05/16/2014 at 8:33pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband's cat died. He has resorted to calling me by her name to comfort himself. FML

#21132092
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44430) - you deserved it (4697)

On 05/06/2014 at 1:42am - animals - by catfriend - United States (California)



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