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Friday 13 December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML

#20985907
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47768) - you deserved it (3178)

On 12/09/2013 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my roommate, who happens to be a writer, got so pissed off at his editor that he got drunk, wrapped his arms around my waist, and only stopped when I agreed to spoon him. This is not the first time this has happened either. FML

#20989886
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40206) - you deserved it (5466)

On 12/12/2013 at 3:51am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my band members and I were brainstorming ideas to help increase our fan base. My drummer suggested they replace me for someone attractive. Everyone agreed and now they are trying to kick me out of the band I started. FML

#20986659
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46686) - you deserved it (3492)

On 12/09/2013 at 6:25pm - misc - by YouAssholes - United States (California)

Today, I told my husband it would be great to spend an evening with a bottle of wine and a pile of blankets on the balcony of our cabin during the cruise. He decided it would be great to ditch me and go out gambling. FML

#20988964
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47389) - you deserved it (5905)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Neglected (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I misplaced my phone at small house party. I found it later, but not before being called a sick bastard by my crush. It seems one of my "friends" sent her a cock pic with my phone, and now she wants nothing to do with me. FML

#20990280
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43409) - you deserved it (5076)

On 12/12/2013 at 4:01pm - love - by spastic hardon (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I sang a romantic song I wrote for my girlfriend. She laughed at my soprano. FML

#20996292
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37848) - you deserved it (7951)

On 12/17/2013 at 8:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, I finally told my father that I was picked on at college all this year over my hearing disability. When I told him one of the jokes they made about me, he burst out into an uncontrollable fit of laughter. FML

#20999250
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39905) - you deserved it (3011)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48826) - you deserved it (5717)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went skiing with a girl I like. On the lift I asked her out. She said no. Halfway up the lift stopped. We were stuck up there for nearly an hour. FML

#20993100
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49340) - you deserved it (5368)

On 12/15/2013 at 3:38am - love - by snowbum69 - United States (Idaho)

Today, my girlfriend refused to take a picture with me to prove to my friends that I do indeed have a girlfriend. I got so desperate that I photoshopped myself into one of her Facebook photos instead. FML

#20996955
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43274) - you deserved it (14311)

On 12/18/2013 at 1:23pm - love - by Wow. - United States

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53097) - you deserved it (4891)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, for my 18th birthday my mum gave me a black lace thong. I'm a guy. FML

#20992659
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41001) - you deserved it (3946)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I learned, 90 horrifying minutes into a college exam, that my 85-year-old calculus teacher had spent the last three weeks teaching us the wrong chapter. FML

#20997770
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48324) - you deserved it (2986)

On 12/19/2013 at 4:09am - work - by wasted time - United States



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