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Tuesday 12 November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found myself admiring my eyelids for being the only parts of my face not covered in acne. FML

#20960938
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43289) - you deserved it (4049)

On 11/17/2013 at 2:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house at 9am to surprise him on our 1 year anniversary. In the process, I gatecrashed another celebration he was having with his second girlfriend. FML

#20962153
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57650) - you deserved it (4088)

On 11/18/2013 at 1:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, at the gym, I realized the guy who has been staring at me for the past 3 days is the same guy I promised to text back 5 months ago. FML

#20954898
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21358) - you deserved it (44240)

On 11/12/2013 at 6:18am - love - by awkwardencounters - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML

#20959118
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44533) - you deserved it (4297)

On 11/15/2013 at 8:53pm - kids - by I don't know, son (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was jogging on my farm when I discovered a cave. Unfortunately for me, I discovered said cave by tripping and falling into it where there was still a 10ft drop to the bottom. FML

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

#20957459
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40931) - you deserved it (4410)

On 11/14/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by CallmeEddie - United States (Illinois)

Today, while on a family Disney world vacation, I saw a kid shitting on a public bathroom's floor. It was my kid. He's 10. FML

#20960450
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40759) - you deserved it (10351)

On 11/17/2013 at 12:33am - kids - by Anonymous -

Today, while taking an order over the phone for the customer at work, I began to hear slight moans. The moans gradually became faster and louder, until climax was achieved and I realized I was being used for phone sex. FML

#20955245
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42439) - you deserved it (3415)

On 11/12/2013 at 3:29pm - work - by long day - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML

#20960650
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42741) - you deserved it (3906)

On 11/17/2013 at 8:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44875) - you deserved it (6905)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

#20954433
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37179) - you deserved it (2728)

On 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm - health - by myheadhurts (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me but wanted to make sure that we were still friends, so he could still use my Netflix. FML

#20963690
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43699) - you deserved it (3419)

On 11/19/2013 at 7:19pm - love - by unwantedforlife (woman) - United States



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