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Tuesday 16 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a man stopped me on the street. He said the stretch marks on my thighs looked like cuts, and asked me if I self-harmed. Before I was able to politely respond "No", he said, "I mean, I can see why you would." FML

#20794407
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45176) - you deserved it (3486)

On 07/20/2013 at 5:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML

#20796495
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47511) - you deserved it (3667)

On 07/21/2013 at 10:35pm - love - by sabrinatarmine_ - United States (California)

Today, one of my bosses said, "You're going to take this as an insult, but it's not. At a certain age, women are supposed to cut their hair short." I have long hair. My bosses have all of the social skills of the guys from Big Bang Theory. FML

#20798680
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36864) - you deserved it (3270)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:23am - work - by Irreverend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my girlfriend about my extreme fear of flying roaches. She immediately got upset because she thought, since I'm from the Caribbean, I would be "manlier" and "eat stuff like that for breakfast". FML

#20783934
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42487) - you deserved it (4471)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:41am - misc - by sammy77sam (man) - Saint Kitts and Nevis (Saint George Basseterre)

Today, ten minutes into a blind date, my date said, "I don't mean to be rude, but... your face? It's the reason booze was invented." FML

#20792695
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52050) - you deserved it (4357)

On 07/19/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

Today, I got a call from the police. Apparently my son tried robbing a teenage couple, but wound up getting his ass beat by both of them. I don't know what's worse, that my 32-year-old son is a criminal, or that he got it handed to him by 15-year-olds. FML

#20797971
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42106) - you deserved it (4978)

On 07/22/2013 at 5:06pm - kids - by Parentalfailure (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got fired from my job as a seafood manager because an entire wedding group came in and started yelling at me, saying the shrimp was horrible and I ruined their wedding. They showed me the leftovers; they never cooked them. They fed raw shrimp at a wedding dinner party. FML

#20796202
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49036) - you deserved it (3481)

On 07/21/2013 at 7:20pm - work - by Gross (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after being unemployed for almost two years, I was turned down for yet another job. The reason this time? I live too far from the job. I can see the building from my bedroom window. FML

Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

#20797503
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47265) - you deserved it (3195)

On 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while texting my boyfriend, I noticed that he copies and pastes old messages so he doesn't have to write new ones. FML

Today, I was on a bus and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep. According to a few other passengers, I nestled into the chest of the guy next to me, and hit him every time he made a noise. FML

#20795078
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41659) - you deserved it (9011)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by accountnamevalid (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 11-year-old daughter heard the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

#20784969
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49760) - you deserved it (4364)

On 07/15/2013 at 8:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



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