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Monday 17 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I learned that the money I work hard for on YouTube has been transferred to the wrong person's banking account. That person is my ex-girlfriend. FML

#20732776
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46260) - you deserved it (6106)

On 06/18/2013 at 2:35am - money - by Broccolliboyy (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

#20742274
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58595) - you deserved it (22866)

On 06/23/2013 at 6:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML

#20736762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49553) - you deserved it (3212)

On 06/20/2013 at 4:35am - money - by what_the_hell (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I found out that my creepy neighbor paid a guy to install a camera in my bathroom. It's been there for three months. The guy he paid? My brother. FML

#20741960
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52309) - you deserved it (2989)

On 06/23/2013 at 12:37am - misc - by part time all the time - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML

#20735044
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51373) - you deserved it (3209)

On 06/19/2013 at 11:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

#20735100
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47048) - you deserved it (4788)

On 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

#20732995
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54232) - you deserved it (5205)

On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML

#20733111
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47435) - you deserved it (19352)

On 06/18/2013 at 11:02am - love - by Well, crap (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML

#20742729
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42814) - you deserved it (4093)

On 06/23/2013 at 2:14pm - misc - by welp, time to become an assassin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I lost my car keys, so I asked my ex-husband if he still had his spare to my car. He said he'd send it. I got an empty envelope with a troll face on it. There's a reason I left him. FML

#20738006
120 comments

Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he say down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML

#20738304
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51211) - you deserved it (7725)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML

#20733745
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53000) - you deserved it (8721)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:01pm - money - by No money, mo' problems - United States

Today, after asking my psychiatrist about natural alternatives to medication for my depression, she replied, "Why not Zoidberg?" FML

#20744996
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30582) - you deserved it (5722)

On 06/24/2013 at 6:12pm - health - by thanksdoc (woman) - United States (Texas)



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