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Saturday 15 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I told my friend, who's a marriage counsellor, about some of the things my husband does that I hate, like snoring loudly and eating with his mouth open. I wasn't asking for advice, but she just looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Divorce." Bye-bye, faith in humanity. FML

#20727839
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35944) - you deserved it (5147)

On 06/15/2013 at 5:08pm - misc - by ineedbetterfriends (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking. FML

#20729997
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51085) - you deserved it (4722)

On 06/16/2013 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by scarredforlife - United States (New York)

Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy; I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off all eyes turned to me. FML

#20731175
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42623) - you deserved it (13927)

On 06/17/2013 at 9:55am - health - by nomwar (woman) - United States

Today, my husband decided he would rather rage-wank to my mum's Facebook profile picture than make love to me. FML

#20741061
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45240) - you deserved it (4872)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:54pm - love - by talktothefacecausethehandswanking (woman) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML

#20741405
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44740) - you deserved it (4762)

On 06/22/2013 at 6:59pm - misc - by Selina - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my grandpa pointed me out to one of his friends, saying, "Yeah, she's the ugly one." FML

#20717602
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48250) - you deserved it (4143)

On 06/10/2013 at 2:14pm - misc - by sadgirl - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was told by my grandfather that I was no longer allowed to visit him or to set foot in his house. Why? He found out I have been taking Japanese and German as electives in my degree, so I must be an 'enemy spy'. FML

#20716829
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48134) - you deserved it (4898)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:09am - work - by Frazz (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time. The minute I stepped in the door his mother hit me in the face and kicked me out because I was "the slut her husband cheated on her with." My older sister and I look much alike. Too much alike. FML

#20719355
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65364) - you deserved it (4433)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up early to travel to the office headquarters 3.5 hours away for important meetings. After waking up at 5.30am, picking up all my colleagues and driving 40 min out of town, I realised I was wearing my woolen house slippers. They were the only pair of shoes I'd brought on the trip. FML

#20722747
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40127) - you deserved it (8621)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:04am - work - by vanity113 - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my dad came home from a trip to Arizona and brought back special hand-picked gifts for the whole family. When he got to me, he smiled, and pulled out a free lotion from the hotel at which he was staying. FML

#20729197
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44107) - you deserved it (3588)

On 06/16/2013 at 11:46am - misc - by loveyadad (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I came back from the doctor after having been diagnosed with a UTI. My dad now won't shut up about it, saying stuff like, "You must be 'pissed'", "Looks like 'urine' a bit of pain", and "'Urea'-lly need some antibiotics, son", all while making obnoxious finger quotes in the air. FML

#20739103
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42478) - you deserved it (4721)

On 06/21/2013 at 2:05pm - health - by assholedad (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

#20720453
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61134) - you deserved it (3062)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a customer broke my nose for refusing to give him a discount because the product he was buying had a fine layer of dust on the box. FML

#20736654
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43224) - you deserved it (3028)

On 06/20/2013 at 2:32am - work - by Whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)



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