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Friday 14 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML

#20728960
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60141) - you deserved it (6191)

On 06/16/2013 at 7:37am - intimacy - by idontwanttoknow - United States

Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML

#20736762
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48778) - you deserved it (3145)

On 06/20/2013 at 4:35am - money - by what_the_hell (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my dad refused to believe that the Animal Planet's mermaid mockumentaries were faked. Instead he got into a huge argument with me, claiming the government is covering up the existence of mermaids and must've threatened the producers to keep it quiet. FML

#20730804
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35600) - you deserved it (4980)

On 06/17/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Idontbelieveinmagic (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML

#20735044
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51263) - you deserved it (3202)

On 06/19/2013 at 11:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML

#20720945
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57717) - you deserved it (4099)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:10am - misc - by Are you f*cking kidding me (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend and I talked about our past relationships. He said he broke up with his last girlfriend because she was "too smart" for him, and that he felt better being with someone who "doesn't have too many lights on upstairs, if you know what I mean." FML

#20729746
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48911) - you deserved it (5649)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by ... (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

#20732995
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53506) - you deserved it (5143)

On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

#20735100
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46348) - you deserved it (4708)

On 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I lost my car keys, so I asked my ex-husband if he still had his spare to my car. He said he'd send it. I got an empty envelope with a troll face on it. There's a reason I left him. FML

#20738006
121 comments

Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML

#20733111
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47351) - you deserved it (19322)

On 06/18/2013 at 11:02am - love - by Well, crap (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he say down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML

#20738304
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51105) - you deserved it (7721)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML

#20724353
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39764) - you deserved it (25042)

On 06/13/2013 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother threw away my brand new headphones. She saw them on the couch with duct tape on the wires and assumed they were "old, broken, and cheap." I put the tape there to avoid damaging the wires. FML

#20720827
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43290) - you deserved it (13017)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:59am - money - by why mom, why? - United States (California)



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