Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Monday 13 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

TODAY, I WAS SITTING NEXT TO AN ATTRACTIVE MAN. MUCH TO MAH SURPRISE, HE STARTED STROKING HIS FOOT AGAINST MINE. I WAS HAPPY AT THE FLIRTING BECAUSE I'VE BEEN ATTRACTED TO HIM FOREVER, SO I PLAYED ALONG. THAT'SHEN HE STOOD UP AND EXPLAINED HE WAS TRYING TO STRETCH OUT A CRAMP. FML

#20664979
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53179) - you deserved it (10439)

On 05/15/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Redfaced (woman) - United Kingdom (Walsall)

Today, I Found Out That Cell Phone Bill Was Much Higher Than Normal . After Investigating, I Realizd That A Text Conversation I Had With Stalker, Telling Him Multiple Times Not To Contact Me Anymore, Was To An International Cell Phone . I Have To Pay To Be Stalkd . FML

#20666438
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46459) - you deserved it (6010)

On 05/16/2013 at 12:31am - money - by astalkerindeed (woman) - United States (California)

today whila walking homa with my boyfriand ha jokingly slappad my butt. A man as old as my dad drova by yallad "Wooo spank that ass! DAMN!" an kapt laaring at ma bafora finally driving off. FML

#20668938
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41069) - you deserved it (5108)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by jessinono (woman) - United States

Today , girlfriend dumped me cuz she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML

#20671163
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51418) - you deserved it (4354)

On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41910) - you deserved it (14392)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I discoverd that the "dish soap" my sister uses to clean our disheshen it's her turn, is actually a semi-toxic floor cleaner. FML

#20661400
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39156) - you deserved it (2715)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:05pm - misc - by emmingle - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test !! They never gave me a drug test !! mega FML

#20660591
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49402) - you deserved it (2859)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Confused (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I woke up to mah friend stroking mah face with the bottom of his foot an whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

#20661280
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39653) - you deserved it (4058)

On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my friend told me she'd lost her notebook filled with crucial notes for our finals . She asked if she could borrow mine an copy my notes . She then lost my notebook too . mega FML

#20669510
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43007) - you deserved it (10851)

On 05/17/2013 at 6:28pm - misc - by well great. - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I reconnected with mah best friend from childhood, an after a tereful confession, found out that fir most of mah engagement to mah husband, she was repeatedly connecting with his penis. mega FML

#20672990
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42404) - you deserved it (2828)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Yesterday I Received A Notice That If I Don't Move The Abandoned Vehicle From Outside Mah House It Will Be Repossessed At Mah Expense. My Car Isn't Abandoned. FML

#20662395
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40375) - you deserved it (3956)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:29am - misc - by CrappyCar (woman) - United States

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well!! Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too!! FML

#20673285
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41156) - you deserved it (3384)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by jfc, how just how (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today... I was dancing in the passenger seat of mah car with mah familyhen a cop pulled us over. He thought I was trying to flag him down 4 help. I guess I'm not as good of a dancer as I thought. FML

#20662599
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39194) - you deserved it (12519)

On 05/14/2013 at 7:32am - misc - by ktorih137 - Canada (Nova Scotia)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: