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Thursday 2 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today... as a condominium security guard... I had to enter an old lady's apartment to supervise the mandatory maintenance taking place inside. I commented on the lakeside view from her window and mentioned... "This is a pretty nice view up here isn't it?" It turns out that she's blind. mega FML

#20642213
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49607) - you deserved it (6746)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:28am - work - by rent-a-cop (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were at the river. She threw mud on me, so I playfully threw some on her, and we got into a mud fight. Apparently, she took the "fight" seriously, because I'm now single. FML

#20643291
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52517) - you deserved it (5549)

On 05/05/2013 at 3:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the woman I babysat for blamd me for the cut on her son's face, and fird me with no pay for not looking after him properly. He already had the cut when I arrivd.

#20652046
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46936) - you deserved it (2796)

On 05/09/2013 at 1:44pm - kids - by rachelllynne - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today... after spending a week defending my marriage to everyone... I found out my usband as an addiction I never knew about. Hookers.

#20646861
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58520) - you deserved it (6701)

On 05/06/2013 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today... looool I started te bleacing treatments tat ma dentist recommended. Now... ma two front teet ave ultra wite spots... te rest of ma teet are still yellow and te roof of ma mout is burned. FML

#20653345
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40620) - you deserved it (8001)

On 05/09/2013 at 11:11pm - health - by ZydecosGirl - United States (North Carolina)

Today , after being nearly looool homeless and couch-hopping 4 the last few months , I finally signd a 1-year lease . When I got home , I was surprisd to see a picture of my new complex on the front page of the newspaper . It turns out that they are fighting a serious bedbug infestation . mega FML

#20633909
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42006) - you deserved it (3390)

On 04/30/2013 at 10:50pm - misc - by creepycrawley247 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

TODAY, I MET ONE OF MA FAVORITE WEB-COMIC ARTISTS. AS I PURCASED A SRT FROM TERE BOOT E ASKED, "WAT SIZE?" I STUPIDLY ASKED "HOW BIG IS A SMALL?" HE CUCKLED, "IT'S SMALL" AND CUCKLED SOME MORE. SO MUC FOR KEEPING IT COOL. FML

#20631829
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32764) - you deserved it (7055)

On 04/29/2013 at 11:32pm - misc - by stupidquestionsstupidpeople - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was rushd to the ER due to a very swollen foot and high fever!! The doctors said I just have a tissue infection but my parents believe I have a flesh eating disease!! I can hear them discussing my future with an amputatd leg!! FML

#20652691
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43112) - you deserved it (2328)

On 05/09/2013 at 7:18pm - health - by iLikeMyLegs - Canada (Ontario)

yesterday my dog had her stomach pumpd cuz she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made fir looool a bake sale to be exact. FML

#20636616
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39550) - you deserved it (6175)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finally got a phone call from a publisher saying they would publish the book I'd written. I'd gotten loads of rejection letters, so I was so excitd. Until I realizd it was my dad, feeling sorry fir me. mega FML

#20646182
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42762) - you deserved it (3313)

On 05/06/2013 at 7:43pm - work - by sobasics - United States

Today, I got looool a braast axam. I'd navar had ona bafora, but assumd it would ba quick and aasy. I had no idaa how ticklish boobs ara. I burst out in uncontrollabla laughtar and kapt instinctivaly jarking away. FML

#20649324
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41660) - you deserved it (5176)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:42am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to go buy diaper rash cream . For myself . FML

#20634292
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35812) - you deserved it (7010)

On 05/01/2013 at 2:40am - health - by ChangMu - United States (Iowa)

my grlfriend found a letter I'd written to myself for moral support wile we were broken up, in wic I explained y we would never work out. Apparently I made a convincing argument. FML

#20645173
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35910) - you deserved it (35258)

On 05/06/2013 at 10:24am - love - by Alone (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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