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Saturday 27 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML

#20613766
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21876) - you deserved it (74041)

On 04/22/2013 at 6:31pm - love - by Out from Hell (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for cheating on her. Her "proof" was an image of me making out with a girl. Pretty damning, except she loaded it up in Photoshop, where I saw the image layers she'd used to fake the whole thing. I'm not sure what the hell she was thinking either. FML

#20637622
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57672) - you deserved it (3817)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:16pm - love - by psycho ex (man) - Brazil

Today, my grandpa moved into the apartment next door. The walls are wafer-thin. Goodbye sex life. FML

Today, after a few weeks of my friends pestering me to spend time with a mutual friend, I realized we had a lot in common. We both love shoes, peanut butter, and it appears that my boyfriend of three years is her boyfriend of four years. FML

#20612533
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72070) - you deserved it (5099)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:58am - love - by Stupid (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, while grocery shopping, I was having such terrible abdominal pains I could hardly walk. As I'm 8 months pregnant, I told my husband we should head home. He thought a better idea was to run through the store and hide from me, hoping to induce labor by making me chase him. FML

#20619241
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50212) - you deserved it (4216)

On 04/24/2013 at 8:18pm - misc - by pregz (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML

#20630741
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18574) - you deserved it (62425)

On 04/29/2013 at 5:11pm - misc - by random - Canada

Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML

#20634407
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56233) - you deserved it (4792)

On 05/01/2013 at 6:30am - money - by Alexman1985 -

Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML

#20639773
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50799) - you deserved it (4582)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:30pm - work - by annoyedgirl - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the hot girl he's been sending nudes to and cybering with for the past month is probably a bored, fat-as-fuck, balding male living in his mum's basement. The look on his face after I proved that "her" pictures were fake broke my heart. FML

#20623794
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44706) - you deserved it (8532)

On 04/26/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by sanoria51 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to share my room with my cousin while she stayed over. I let her take my bed while I slept on the floor. Not only do my back and neck hurt, but I had to clean vomit out of my hair. Apparently, she "wasn't feeling well" last night. FML

#20640612
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51072) - you deserved it (4412)

On 05/04/2013 at 9:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML

#20629715
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50119) - you deserved it (12673)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:08am - intimacy - by unforgettablee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64970) - you deserved it (9795)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I popped a pimple while stopped at a red light. When I looked over the woman in the car next to me was laughing, and had her camera phone out. FML

#20627066
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42666) - you deserved it (16314)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:28am - health - by msarosi - Canada (Ontario)



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