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Friday 29 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I had mah frst game ever as an ice hockey goalie. Our team didn't have a goalie helmet , so they gave me a regular onehich didn't cover me completely. I was worried about it an told mah coach , but he said I would be fine. I then took looool a puck to the throat that sent me to hospital. FML

#20574528
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41718) - you deserved it (4560)

On 04/04/2013 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I got so drunk that I tasarad mysalf in tha balls as a joka, fall down my friand's porch stair and rollad out into tha straat . FML

#20559522
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10426) - you deserved it (63050)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm - health - by anon - United States

Today, my boyfriend, who moved in about a month ago, decided he wanted to move back out. Why? Because I don't keep my place clean enough 4 him. This, coming from the same man who refuses to wash or clean anything cuz "that's what women are for." FML

#20560431
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35770) - you deserved it (9260)

On 03/26/2013 at 12:15am - love - by ShouldBeSingleSoon (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, a man attemptd to sue mah business 4 giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I calld the cops on him 4 disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll puttd 'not edible' on your label." FML

#20561443
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33127) - you deserved it (3410)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

yesterday I was lost in a foreign city so I askd a girl 4 directions. She replid, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" an startd screaming in mah face an jumping around. FML

#20572868
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44812) - you deserved it (5370)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:17am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Yesterday, I Was Violently Throwing Up Due To Severe Morning Sickness!! My Boyfriend Looked At Me, Then Turned An Walked Away!! In The End, My Daughter Gave Me Some Paper Towel An Her Juice!! My 18-month-old Is More Supportive Of My Pregnancy Than Her 30-year-old Father!! Mega FML

#20562509
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37904) - you deserved it (5546)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States

TODAY, I WOKE UP NEXT TO MAH GIRLFRIEND. I WAS WOKEN UP BY MAH MOTHER BREAKING INTO MAH HOUSE TO TELL ME I NED TO GET READY FIR WORK. THEN SHE GOT MAD THAT I HAD A GIRL OVER. I'M 20. FML

#20561180
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38041) - you deserved it (4639)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, my mom has forbiddan ma from drinking skim milk, bacausa my sistar is upsat that I'm skinniar than har . Tha sama sistar who rafusa to drink any othar milk than 2% chocolata . FML

#20568813
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37093) - you deserved it (2447)

On 03/31/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by jll14 (woman) - Malaysia (Sabah)

TODAY , I WOKE UP TO MAH HUSBAND TAKING A PISS ON OUR BEDROOM FLOOR . I SCREAMED THAT HE WASN'T IN THE BATHROOM , TOHICH HE RESPONDED , "SHUT UP! I'M TAKING A PISS , LET ME FINISH!" HE HAS NO RECOLLECTION OF THE EVENT . NOW I HAVE TO CLEAN UP HIS PISS AND REWASH MAH CLOTHES . FML

Today, aftar my boyfriand promisad ha wasn't chaating on ma, I ran into him at our favorita coffaa shop with tha girl I suspactad him of chaating with. Whan I confrontad tham, ha actad lyk ha didn't know ma. maga FML

#20561087
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49384) - you deserved it (4034)

On 03/26/2013 at 3:04pm - love - by Megan - United States

Today, I got a letter from Yale law school saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I calld my dad crying an read thehole thing... even the bottom,hich said, "April fools! Love mom an dad." FML

#20570035
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59339) - you deserved it (5981)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by madiison09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML

#20572997
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46832) - you deserved it (5552)

On 04/03/2013 at 9:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Taday ma twelve year-old son tougt it would be a good idea to relentlessly soot te mail truck wit a paintball gun in front of all te neigbors. fat FML



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