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Wednesday 27 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

TODAY... WILST TEXTING MY BOYFRIEND ON TE TRAIN... I NOTICED TE WOMAN SITTING NEXT TO ME STARING INTENTLY AT MY PONE. AFTER LETTING MY BOYFRIEND KNOW... E SENT A MESSAGE SAYING... "ARE WE GONNA INVOLVE TE DOG AGAIN? LAST NIGT WAS FUN." SE GASPED AND SCREAMED TAT I'M A "TWISTED DOG-UMPING BITC." FML

#20560035
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40147) - you deserved it (6840)

On 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I finished installing remote access CCTV cameras around my house due to the high rate of burglaries around my nieghborhood. I turn it on to see my teenage son rubbing one out on the couch. FML

#20563419
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41046) - you deserved it (23325)

On 03/28/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by couch_potato (man) -

Today, the McDonald's in mah town ran out of fries!! I was the oneho had to tell all the angry customers we had no more fries in the store!! FML

#20571214
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34192) - you deserved it (3548)

On 04/02/2013 at 3:24am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I texted a grl I met at the bar last night. She accused me of being "fake" because she couldn't fine me on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter, then threatened to call the cops on me. FML

#20566421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34736) - you deserved it (3024)

On 03/30/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today... I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I looool had orderd near mah seat. I immediately ran up to him and askd him to stop stealing mah food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Second later the attendant cummd out with mah actual food. FML

#20562925
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9583) - you deserved it (68974)

On 03/27/2013 at 9:02pm - misc - by Hahamaster333 -

TODAY... SUFFERING FROM SEVERE MORNING SICKNES FOLLOWED BY CRAVING FIR SALTY FOOD... I HAD STACKED OUR FRIDGE WITH YUMMY SNACKS. WHEN FINALLY EMERGING FROM OUR BATHROOM AFTER RETCHING THIS MORNING... I FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND HAD EATEN ALL MY SNACK THE NIGHT BEFORE. FAT FML

#20571483
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32535) - you deserved it (3901)

On 04/02/2013 at 11:04am - health - by moosemay (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I Had To Clean Up The Urine Puddle Left By One Of The Regularsho Plays The Poker Slot Machines At The Barhere I Work. Rather Than Reserve The Machine To Go To The Bathroom, She Literally Sits In Her Own Piss To Mark Her Territory. This Happens About Every Second Day. FML

Today, I found out I'm failing school. Why am I failing? Because I work 60 hours a week. Why do I work 60 hours a week? To pay 4 school. mega FML

#20563641
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45055) - you deserved it (4711)

On 03/28/2013 at 10:26am - work - by school issues - United States

2dayhile I Was At Work, I Was On The Verge Of Tears. My Coworker Askedhat Was Wrong And I Explained That I Recently Had To Putted My Dog Down. He Then Replied, "Cool Story, Bro. Tell It Again." FML

#20565029
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38131) - you deserved it (3323)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -

2day mah little sister figured out how to use the printer. I looool came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over mah room. FML

#20571278
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32625) - you deserved it (5281)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was on te toilet,en I noticed looool I could see my daugter dancing in te oter room in te mrror, so I took a picture wit my pone. After I uploaded it, people pointed out tat I was visible in te picture, sitting on te toilet and smiling. fat FML

#20566415
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15162) - you deserved it (56570)

On 03/30/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by crunknasty - United States (California)

Today I announcd to my family that I got acceptd into Harvard!! My grandma laughd an mutterd "Liar." FML

#20567796
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38423) - you deserved it (2884)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today , a customer cummed up to me and asked if I knew were te make-up aisle was. I pointed im in te rigt drection but e just gasped and said , "O so u DO know were it is!" and walked away , roaring wit laugter. FML

#20562040
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35728) - you deserved it (3483)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:29am - work - by apparentlytoougly (woman) - United States (California)



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