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Friday 15 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML

#20553362
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36608) - you deserved it (15861)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:01am - intimacy - by meeee (woman) - United States

Today, as I was walking with my boyfriend, holding hands, a woman began screaming at us about how we "f*ggots" are "ruining America." I'm a girl. FML

#20551759
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33721) - you deserved it (3728)

On 03/20/2013 at 12:54am - love - by Too manly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had an interview for a job I really wanted. On my resume, I wrote that I speak conversational Spanish, although I don't. When I arrived for the interview, my interviewer decided to conduct it in Spanish. FML

#20549811
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6973) - you deserved it (76540)

On 03/18/2013 at 7:42pm - work - by nohablaespanol - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

#20552400
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36392) - you deserved it (3526)

On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States

Today, I invited my long-lost best friend over, because I haven't seen her much since she got a new boyfriend. 20 minutes into hanging out, he showed up at my door. He still hasn't left, and they're having sex on my couch right now. FML

#20540616
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48574) - you deserved it (6348)

On 03/12/2013 at 9:22am - intimacy - by kenleybunch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was over at a friend's house feeding her cats while she was on vacation. After feeding the four of them, I found an extra cat under the sofa. Thinking it was an intruding stray, I kicked it out. She actually has 5 cats. FML

#20548954
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11495) - you deserved it (48770)

On 03/18/2013 at 5:17am - animals - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34460) - you deserved it (16819)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I figured I needed to clean my room. I ended up finding my $135 calculator that I'd accused my ex-boyfriend of selling for gas money. That's also the reason I dumped him. FML

#20539612
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8465) - you deserved it (65149)

On 03/11/2013 at 2:56pm - money - by supertango500 (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my cat giving birth, on my bed. I adopted her from a friend, who told me she was spayed. Now I have a giant mess and a cat who won't let me move either her or her babies. Guess I'm sleeping on the couch for a while. FML

Today, I walked into work, a day after losing my shit with our systems admin, due to her taking ages to enable my new email account. I was soon bitched out, warned, and suspended over several lewd emails having been sent overnight from my account to various female co-workers. FML

#20544551
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13941) - you deserved it (27730)

On 03/15/2013 at 8:35am - work - by benoit (man) - France

Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML

#20554618
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31751) - you deserved it (2373)

On 03/22/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by XoxoChula - United States

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38738) - you deserved it (14702)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML

#20551973
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39789) - you deserved it (5612)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States



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