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November 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

#21296102
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34546) - you deserved it (4898)

On 11/10/2014 at 9:28am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, my friendly neighbor asked me to check in on his apartment every few days while he's gone on vacation. You can imagine my horror when I walked in for the first time and found out he's a snake breeder. Twelve more days to go. FML

#21302388
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28155) - you deserved it (2949)

On 11/19/2014 at 9:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I looked at my twelve-year-old daughter's test. One of the question was, "When is a good time to worry about your parents?" Her answer was, "When they take selfies, because selfies aren't made for old people." FML

#21292082
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29919) - you deserved it (5571)

On 11/04/2014 at 4:48pm - kids - by The Selfie Parent - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34105) - you deserved it (3394)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML

#21293619
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31996) - you deserved it (3613)

On 11/06/2014 at 7:30pm - love - by really - United States

Today, my boyfriend was giving me a back massage while I was laying on my stomach. A few minutes into it, he stopped. I turned around to see why; he was taking a picture of my butt. FML

#21290182
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29158) - you deserved it (6429)

On 11/02/2014 at 12:51am - love - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML

#21298550
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32375) - you deserved it (2301)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:21pm - misc - by JoshTheUnluckyFromKentucky - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend was cheating on me. Her excuse? I was the one that had initially introduced them. FML

#21298582
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31238) - you deserved it (2625)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:59pm - intimacy - by johnnycomehelpme - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up, only to find my Xbox missing. Thankfully I have a security camera discreetly wired up in the tree on my lawn. Checking the tapes, I saw my brother park outside my house, let himself in with his spare key, then drive off with my missing equipment. FML

#21303975
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28018) - you deserved it (2376)

On 11/22/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

#21302695
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27848) - you deserved it (2235)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML

#21293180
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31670) - you deserved it (2468)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:53am - work - by HelpMe1 (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML

#21302674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29599) - you deserved it (2569)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was so lonely, I caught myself whispering to my food just so I had someone to talk to. FML



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