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January 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend uploaded a pic to snapchat that said "the love of my life." It was a pic of our beautiful baby girl. Then he uploaded another pic that said "the 2nd love of my life." It was a pic of the fuel truck he drives for work. FML

#21342658
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27845) - you deserved it (3704)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:33am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my father was playing with my son and his toy animals. He picked one up and said, "What is this? Some kind of African horse?" It was a zebra. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

#21341327
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27200) - you deserved it (10004)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:10pm - intimacy - by chelse_elyce - United States

Today, I got a yeast infection, caused by the antibiotics for my UTI. I got the UTI after having sex for the first time in a year. A couple of minutes of sex have ruined my health. FML

#21334755
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26505) - you deserved it (3836)

On 01/10/2015 at 10:21pm - health - by so much for romance - United States (New York)

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

#21336619
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31752) - you deserved it (4958)

On 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I accidentally sent my teacher a picture of me in my boyfriend's boxers instead of my essay. FML

#21334385
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24632) - you deserved it (18750)

On 01/10/2015 at 9:35am - misc - by kb (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got reprimanded by my boss for saying "It's a stab in the dark, though." According to him, it's a euphemism for anal sex and I was being offensive to a gay colleague, the same one who kept insisting it was no problem. I got written up anyway. FML

#21330417
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29790) - you deserved it (1989)

On 01/04/2015 at 1:52am - work - by boss stabber (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML

#21335578
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29309) - you deserved it (5826)

On 01/12/2015 at 2:56am - intimacy - by briiiiiiii123 - United States (New York)

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12040) - you deserved it (21396)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, like every day, I woke up at 3 in the morning because my roommate needs "a three hour warning" before his real alarm goes off. His alarm is a constant beeping noise which he always ignores for a good 10 minutes before finally getting up and turning it off. FML

#21338310
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28443) - you deserved it (2567)

On 01/16/2015 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my girlfriend asked me not to love her so much, so she doesn't have to try so hard to match my love for her. What the fuck? FML

#21338940
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26994) - you deserved it (8499)

On 01/17/2015 at 2:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the local park for some romantic time together. By the time we left, I'd been called a pedo and a cradle robber, and been given several dirty looks. I'm 31. My boyfriend is 30 and just very baby-faced. FML

#21345623
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20511) - you deserved it (1738)

On 01/28/2015 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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Wednesday 28 January 2015

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