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October 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while cuddling in bed with my drunk boyfriend, he kissed me softly then told me under no circumstances would he ever marry me. Then kissed me again. FML

#21272098
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38781) - you deserved it (3845)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:46pm - love - by kittenfish8903 (woman) - United States

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30549) - you deserved it (17802)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my son was selling pot for pesos. We live in New Jersey and have never planned on going to Mexico. FML

#21268628
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37274) - you deserved it (4534)

On 09/30/2014 at 10:30pm - kids - by Potforapeso (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd feel like a failure if he went to community college. I'm planning to go to community college next year. FML

#21277941
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30691) - you deserved it (4090)

On 10/14/2014 at 9:06pm - love - by failure - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend admitted than he's been using Febreze instead of showering for the past month. FML

Today, my little sister decided the best way to cheat on a test is to take someone else's test, scratch through their name in pencil, and write her name underneath. She starts high school next semester. FML

#21272741
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32361) - you deserved it (2765)

On 10/07/2014 at 12:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying "It's for my acne." FML

#21270394
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35311) - you deserved it (4191)

On 10/03/2014 at 11:08pm - health - by Disappointed -

Today, I accidentally belched at the dinner table. At age 22, I got sent to my room with no dessert by my parents. FML

#21279192
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31074) - you deserved it (7735)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:32pm - misc - by not saying it was whores, but... - United States

Today, I thought I would be cute for my 1 year anniversary with my girlfriend so I cooked a three course meal for her with candles and rose petals on the floor. She loved the dinner, except now she's passed out in a food coma upstairs while I'm left with the dishes. FML

#21270586
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34780) - you deserved it (6243)

On 10/04/2014 at 9:57am - love - by cuteloser (man) - Australia

Today, my allergies flared up and I started sneezing. I guess my girlfriend was having a bad day, because she lost her shit and started telling me how annoying I am and how I can never do anything right. I'm not sure if we're still a couple, because she stormed out and won't answer my calls. FML

#21270617
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34958) - you deserved it (2714)

On 10/04/2014 at 11:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, I got stitches in my breast. I never knew how much they jiggled until every bump on the road made my breast feel like it was on fire. FML

#21278689
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33211) - you deserved it (2428)

On 10/15/2014 at 10:33pm - health - by BoobiePain - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, the only reason I work 12-hour shifts and close at midnight every Saturday is because my boss doesn't like the fact that I have a boyfriend. FML

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40826) - you deserved it (5063)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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