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March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML

#21375407
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29289) - you deserved it (2131)

On 03/16/2015 at 12:10am - love - by anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was startled by my roommate marching a drunk man out of our apartment. Somehow he found his way in complete darkness into the bathroom without alerting me or my dog next to the only door. He mistook the clothes hamper for the toilet. FML

#21379064
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24082) - you deserved it (2235)

On 03/21/2015 at 6:29pm - misc - by Nexpecto (man) - United States

Today, while discussing my grades with my mother, she told me that when she was my age she was dumb but hardworking, and my dad was lazy but very smart. She then added, "You managed to get the worst out of each of us." FML

#21372077
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (3132)

On 03/10/2015 at 8:19pm - misc - by Daughter of the year - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, I went out with two friends for lunch. The van we took ran out of fuel, so we pushed it to a nearby gas station, a gas station suffering from a gas shortage. FML

#21379106
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26386) - you deserved it (2817)

On 03/21/2015 at 8:07pm - misc - by van no gough (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was given a new responsibility at the law firm where I work. I'm now in charge of punching holes in every single piece of paper to be found in the office, estimated to be in the hundred-thousands. The reason? I finish my daily clerical work too quickly. FML

#21372587
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24961) - you deserved it (2145)

On 03/11/2015 at 4:15pm - work - by KillMePlease (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was helping out during the school play's interval. My head of year jokingly asked me to follow him around with these mini cocktail sausages for the rest of the school year. I thought it would be witty to reply, "Does that make me your official sausage holder?" FML

#21378332
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24250) - you deserved it (7641)

On 03/20/2015 at 10:41am - love - by MirandaJones (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, it's been almost 2 months since I moved into my new place, and it's the first time a girl has slept in my bed. I also slept on my new couch for the first time. FML

#21367098
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26576) - you deserved it (3884) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/02/2015 at 9:03pm - love - by Marc (man) - Hong Kong

Today, my dad spent 30 minutes incorrectly correcting me about our legal system. He thinks he knows more than me because he's been divorced twice. I'm a lawyer. FML

#21376903
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30727) - you deserved it (2051)

On 03/18/2015 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, we got CCTV fitted in our store. My lovely boss told me he'll be spending his free time watching the footage on his phone to know what I get up to when he's not in. FML

#21379507
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21157) - you deserved it (2396)

On 03/22/2015 at 2:19pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, during a date with my girlfriend, I found out you can hiccup hard enough to convince someone that you're having a seizure. FML

#21375726
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28331) - you deserved it (2264)

On 03/16/2015 at 3:15pm - misc - by redneckpunk (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while on the train heading to my new job, my coat caught between two seats. I didn't notice until my stop. I whacked myself in the face in front of everyone trying to get it free, and ended up missing my stop. When I finally got to work, I was told not to bother coming in again. FML

#21365771
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30787) - you deserved it (2352)

On 03/01/2015 at 8:31am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was sitting in the airport, watching the baggage handlers load the plane I was about to get on. They were being really rough with it, one bag came open and all the clothes spilled out onto the tarmac. The clothes looked familiar. They were mine. FML

#21378005
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29673) - you deserved it (1959)

On 03/19/2015 at 8:54pm - misc - by Hm (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, an old lady was walking behind me. She tripped and started to fall, so naturally I turned and outstretched my arms to catch her, but was too late. A man turned just in time to see an old lady on the ground with me with my arms stretched out. I now have a black eye. FML

#21380543
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27644) - you deserved it (2026)

On 03/24/2015 at 2:58am - misc - by why me - United States (Georgia)



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