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March 2015

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Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

#21382179
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20965) - you deserved it (8342)

On 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm - misc - by comfort_ - United States (Georgia)

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

#21365511
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30039) - you deserved it (3070)

On 02/28/2015 at 9:47pm - intimacy - by k8thagr8 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

#21378507
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27028) - you deserved it (2058)

On 03/20/2015 at 5:23pm - misc - by ~__~ -

Today, I got a laptop for my birthday. I was thrilled until I realized that my mom had given away my old one without asking. 6 years of games, music, and pictures down the drain. FML

#21367193
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32692) - you deserved it (2319)

On 03/03/2015 at 10:34am - misc - by Hi-Tech (woman) - Europe

Today, I was at my Mandarin teacher's house. I had diarrhoea and had to go to the toilet. My mum texted me while I was still in the toilet saying, "We all heard you". FML

#21378919
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26961) - you deserved it (2231)

On 03/21/2015 at 12:47pm - misc - by poop - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I finally went to the doctor's about my severe anxiety. I am so used to putting on a happy performance around people that she didn't believe anything was wrong with me. FML

#21376536
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48) - you deserved it (3209)

On 03/17/2015 at 5:35pm - health - by scared - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered that the man I have been talking to on a dating site is actually my ex-boyfriend. He created a fake profile and made me fall for someone that doesn't exist. We got on better anonymously than we ever did in 3 years together. FML

#21373070
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30685) - you deserved it (3266)

On 03/12/2015 at 9:53am - love - by mylovelifeisanepicfail (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my stomach started to hurt. When I got home, my parents had company over, which I had to rush past to use the bathroom. After being in the bathroom for about 3 minutes, my mother yells to me from the other room, in front of the guests, "Are you OK in there?" I'm 27. FML

#21382322
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24415) - you deserved it (3365)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:12am - misc - by struckbystarzz (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28279) - you deserved it (3405)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I popped a boner during a singing audition for no apparent reason. I had to stand there for three minutes and finish the song. FML

#21384034
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12182) - you deserved it (1183)

On 03/30/2015 at 7:16am - misc - by uncontrollable - Korea, Republic of

Today, I ate a wonderful meal, after which I fell asleep on my couch and had a dream that my husband was passionately kissing me. I woke up to realize it was actually my cat licking bits of food out of my teeth. FML

Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML

#21380370
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25302) - you deserved it (13236)

On 03/23/2015 at 9:04pm - misc - by Li - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I tried a new hairstyle to impress a guy I like. I was pretty confident, until he took one look at me and said, "Uh... why's there an onion on your head?" So much for that. FML

#21376359
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44) - you deserved it (5186)

On 03/17/2015 at 12:25pm - love - by RS (woman) - United States (Florida)



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Friday 27 March 2015

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