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October 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML

#21282364
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26220) - you deserved it (2507)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:41am - kids - by Bald (man) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my co-worker told me that my other co-worker is in the process of getting a divorce. I got really excited because his marriage is very toxic. He overheard me say, "He deserves that divorce!" I meant it in a good way, but I don't think he took it that way. FML

#21268618
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30292) - you deserved it (10348)

On 09/30/2014 at 10:20pm - work - by oopsydaisy (woman) - United States

Today, as I was about to leave home for my first sweet taste of freedom at my new apartment, my car died. I'm stuck here for at least the weekend and can look forward to my mom driving me to work. Freedom. FML

#21274254
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26762) - you deserved it (2387)

On 10/09/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by gonesofast - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I knocked over and broke one of two very expensive wine bottles. As I was using the mop to clean it up, the handle knocked over and broke the other. FML

#21275769
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27893) - you deserved it (7778)

On 10/11/2014 at 7:04pm - misc - by ojskyguy - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I had to write, "Do not use to freeze cat," on my bag of ice because my sister's cat died, and she refuses to bury it. FML

#21275907
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28726) - you deserved it (2329)

On 10/11/2014 at 11:14pm - animals - by MrG - United States

Today, the kids on my cross country team were planning a big surprise party for one of the girls, whose birthday is in a few weeks. It's my birthday today. FML

#21281118
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28763) - you deserved it (2059)

On 10/19/2014 at 2:19pm - misc - by forgotten (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML

#21274726
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33167) - you deserved it (5047)

On 10/10/2014 at 1:52am - love - by Jasmine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and head butted me. Now there is just an awkward silence. FML

#21270556
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32609) - you deserved it (3854)

On 10/04/2014 at 8:11am - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML

#21283230
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20336) - you deserved it (2700)

On 10/22/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by CJune24 (woman) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML

#21281510
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28769) - you deserved it (2106)

On 10/20/2014 at 12:53am - work - by are you kidding me - United States (Kansas)

Today, while doing physical therapy exercises for my broken leg, I managed to throw my back out. Now I can neither walk nor sit up. FML

#21281586
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26590) - you deserved it (2237)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:00am - health - by cray12 - United States

Today, I didn't make dinner fast enough so somebody had a yelling and screaming temper tantrum. It would be understandable if the person who threw the tantrum was a child, and not my 57-year-old father. FML

#21283737
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13563) - you deserved it (1132)

On 10/23/2014 at 11:56am - misc - by mnote (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, as a restaurant manager, I had a large party of difficult guests. They sat in their private room they'd reserved for three-and-a-half hours, then caused a huge scene when it was time to pay. One guy even ran at me like he was going to hit me. FML

#21276013
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32013) - you deserved it (2233)

On 10/12/2014 at 2:40am - work - by stressed - United States (Georgia)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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