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September 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

#21252132
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34995) - you deserved it (3139)

On 09/04/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by AllieG33 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my hormones decided to make my pimples appear symmetrically on my face around my nose and mouth. FML

#21253432
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31270) - you deserved it (2409)

On 09/07/2014 at 12:52am - health - by SymmetricalPizzaFace (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

#21257414
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34784) - you deserved it (3128)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:36am - misc - by Jamestown of Vagina (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized how truly insecure I really am, when the guy in the show I'm watching looked straight into the camera and I immediately looked away. FML

#21253498
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34870) - you deserved it (4612)

On 09/07/2014 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while giving directions to a blind guy, I accidentally made him walk into a wall. FML

#21261532
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23907) - you deserved it (5705)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:14pm - misc - by camerashyguy - United States (Texas)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14593) - you deserved it (3544)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for jokingly telling her to get back in the kitchen. After we finally made peace and I told her that I fully respect women, I turned on my stereo. The song's first words? "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." Cue second argument. FML

#21252547
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33790) - you deserved it (15923)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was checking my schedule online and noticed that I wasn't scheduled for any shifts next week. Not thinking it was a big deal, I called HR to get it corrected, only to find out I was laid off and they "forgot" to tell me. FML

#21254078
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36640) - you deserved it (2117)

On 09/07/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by soontobehobo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML

#21256734
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19495) - you deserved it (24892)

On 09/12/2014 at 1:50am - misc - by oops... - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had a garage sale, and had amongst my clothing a few sets of underwear. A old man came up and asked to buy all of them. I'm so poor, I couldn't say no to the pervert. FML

#21262480
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5237) - you deserved it (927)

On 09/21/2014 at 2:23pm - money - by sickened (woman) - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, my co-workers threw me a surprise 30th birthday party. After lighting sparklers on the cake and singing happy birthday, we all enjoyed a few moments of sparkly, happy fun time. Then the building's fire alarm tripped and over 200 people had to be evacuated. FML

#21259630
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28619) - you deserved it (3569)

On 09/16/2014 at 7:23pm - work - by so so old now (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while my orthodontist was working on my teeth, she made the comment, "Wow! It looks like a murder scene in there!" FML

#21250795
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32048) - you deserved it (4746)

On 09/02/2014 at 9:35pm - health - by Gee... Thanks (man) -

Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He apologized by biting my leg. FML

#21251454
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31038) - you deserved it (2650)

On 09/03/2014 at 9:24pm - kids - by adeeri - United States (Wyoming)



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