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December 2014

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Today, my husband sent me a link to an article titled "5 ways you are unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage." FML

Today, I ate at Subway during my lunch hour. A group of teenage girls sat down at the table next to mine. They all shared good laugh about the "friendless, chubby chick" sitting near them, while attempting to discreetly point at me. FML

#21317606
132 comments

Today, I was shocked to notice that my hair has started growing out entirely silver, supposedly due to pregnancy. I'm 19. Apparently, according to my aunt, "It runs in the family." FML

#21320202
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23647) - you deserved it (4736)

On 12/19/2014 at 5:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21948) - you deserved it (29159)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

#21311570
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35047) - you deserved it (5347)

On 12/04/2014 at 6:46pm - kids - by aprouddaddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML

#21312961
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20416) - you deserved it (32818)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:10am - misc - by .__. (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30996) - you deserved it (2506)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino, so I thought he'd like it if I made a bit of noise and called him "papi" while we did it. It freaked him out enough to kill his boner, and now he thinks I have some kind of incest fetish. FML

#21310722
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18294) - you deserved it (36255)

On 12/03/2014 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML

#21312200
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27070) - you deserved it (13570)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:32pm - animals - by sting - United States (California)

Today, at my daughter's ballet recital, after she was done dancing, grown adults booed. She's five. FML

#21315826
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38961) - you deserved it (2187)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:43pm - kids - by anon - United States (New York)

Today, after months of saving, I went to buy the wedding ring I promised to buy my fiancée. Just seconds after I walked in, the owner asked me to leave, saying he doesn't serve "trash" like me, while pointing at the memorial tattoo on the back of my hand. FML

#21316839
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30754) - you deserved it (2890)

On 12/13/2014 at 3:21pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I realized that although I'm dating the most loveable, caring and genuine man, the fact that he's a crack addict means I'll never be his drug of choice when he needs a hit. FML

#21310760
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26433) - you deserved it (18386)

On 12/03/2014 at 1:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my Canadian friend is staying a few days at my parents' house. I drove him from the airport, only to find my idiot dad had decked the spare room out with maple syrup bottles. He keeps saying "eh" all the time and asked "What's he so upset aboot?" when my friend was offended. FML

#21316775
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29522) - you deserved it (2749)

On 12/13/2014 at 1:36pm - misc - by ehxtraordinarily pissed (man) - United States (Oklahoma)



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