Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52526) - you deserved it (3117)
On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45130) - you deserved it (3047)
On 05/14/2013 at 8:03am - health - by toothache - United States (Illinois)
Today, my water broke while my boyfriend was breaking up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62165) - you deserved it (5258)
On 05/08/2013 at 1:41am - health - by Carrie - United States (California)
Today, I was berated by a pharmacist, who said that kids these days are on so many unnecessary medications for "fake diseases". I was just trying to pick up the medication I've been prescribed to control my epilepsy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38036) - you deserved it (2214)
On 05/03/2013 at 4:52pm - health - by SSeizeTheDay (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51538) - you deserved it (3845)
On 05/07/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by the girl next door (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39370) - you deserved it (2822)
On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19383) - you deserved it (41905)
On 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52172) - you deserved it (5534)
On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, by pure chance, I found the website where my boyfriend has been getting all the cute, "original" romantic texts he sends me, including the one that made me fall in love with him to begin with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37851) - you deserved it (7922)
On 05/09/2013 at 12:30pm - love - by Anonymous - Saudi Arabia (Makkah)
Today, the neighbors in the next apartment reported me to the police for screaming at my newborn to "shut the hell up" every time he cries. I would never yell at my baby. My asshole of a dog on the other hand barks at everything, which terrifies the baby, causing him to cry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35092) - you deserved it (4368)
On 05/01/2013 at 7:22pm - animals - by Annonymous_Dad (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22493) - you deserved it (1736)
On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46948) - you deserved it (2831)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39399) - you deserved it (6849)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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