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May 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

#21149341
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40641) - you deserved it (4147)

On 05/23/2014 at 3:32pm - kids - by todaddy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my neighbor collects body-bags. FML

#21139874
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39738) - you deserved it (3516)

On 05/14/2014 at 5:46pm - misc - by chellegbelle - United States (Washington)

Today, my son gave me some flowers for Mother's Day. Unfortunately, the only time I can enjoy them is when I go into the bathroom where they are kept so the cat doesn't eat them. FML

Today, my wife's cat ran away. After spending a lot of money making "Lost Cat" flyers and driving around for hours passing them out and searching for her cat, he walked downstairs. FML

Today, I pulled up next to a lady who was trying to text, smoke, and drive. My brother said that she was probably going to cause an accident. He was right. At the next light she hit us. She then yelled that I purposely caused the accident because, "that's how teenagers are". FML

#21129304
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46877) - you deserved it (3043)

On 05/03/2014 at 1:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my husband's cat died. He has resorted to calling me by her name to comfort himself. FML

#21132092
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40915) - you deserved it (4345)

On 05/06/2014 at 1:42am - animals - by catfriend - United States (California)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47382) - you deserved it (7214)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my best friend wanted to see what my new boyfriend looks like. By chance, he'd sent me a Snapchat a few minutes before, so I opened it to show her, only to see that it was a dick pic. FML

#21132642
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33152) - you deserved it (39069)

On 05/06/2014 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML

#21154900
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43357) - you deserved it (16169)

On 05/28/2014 at 5:12pm - misc - by chevygirl51 - United States

Today, I discovered that my dad still doesn't consider my career as an app developer a "real job". FML

#21153696
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38601) - you deserved it (6992)

On 05/27/2014 at 6:23pm - work - by seriously? - United States (Virginia)

Today, some girl's mom gave me a load of abuse for endangering her daughter's health. How? By deleting my Facebook account, which caused her to have a serious panic attack. Apparently she thought we were best friends, and that I was ditching her. I'm confused too. FML

#21149491
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42562) - you deserved it (3122)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:44pm - misc - by nikaea (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out our newborn snores worse than his father. FML

#21155774
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44861) - you deserved it (5528)

On 05/29/2014 at 11:18am - kids - by bananna - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

#21158075
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53810) - you deserved it (7357)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:40am - love - by damn it rose (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)



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