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May 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49965) - you deserved it (7536)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML

#21153463
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50824) - you deserved it (6666)

On 05/27/2014 at 2:47pm - misc - by N O - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

#21158075
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54293) - you deserved it (7404)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:40am - love - by damn it rose (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my son gave me some flowers for Mother's Day. Unfortunately, the only time I can enjoy them is when I go into the bathroom where they are kept so the cat doesn't eat them. FML

Today, out of habit from twelve years of karate classes, I bowed to my teacher as I exited my classroom. My chemistry classroom. FML

#21156297
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42361) - you deserved it (6766)

On 05/29/2014 at 7:32pm - work - by mathesonn - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my neighbor collects body-bags. FML

#21139874
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42055) - you deserved it (3725)

On 05/14/2014 at 5:46pm - misc - by chellegbelle - United States (Washington)

Today, I discovered that my dad still doesn't consider my career as an app developer a "real job". FML

#21153696
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41036) - you deserved it (7416)

On 05/27/2014 at 6:23pm - work - by seriously? - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boss fired me after chewing me out for the horrible date he had with my mother. FML

#21138556
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49118) - you deserved it (4264)

On 05/13/2014 at 10:29am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boss yet again said she was "literally dying", after she watched a funny video online. Long story short, I'm now on her shitlist because I couldn't help but point out that she clearly wasn't dying, and that her ranting was distracting me from doing actual work. FML

#21142829
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35565) - you deserved it (17549)

On 05/17/2014 at 12:02pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, some girl's mom gave me a load of abuse for endangering her daughter's health. How? By deleting my Facebook account, which caused her to have a serious panic attack. Apparently she thought we were best friends, and that I was ditching her. I'm confused too. FML

#21149491
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45231) - you deserved it (3369)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:44pm - misc - by nikaea (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boss told our production department that we're not allowed to be happy. FML

#21129081
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40367) - you deserved it (3390)

On 05/02/2014 at 8:03pm - work - by i guess (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had an ingrown toenail cut out, and the pain medication I received does not actually help with the pain. Instead, it makes me high, which results in me losing balance and slamming my injured toe into objects and then getting sick from that new pain. FML

#21128289
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43964) - you deserved it (4502)

On 05/01/2014 at 8:23pm - health - by pained (woman) - United States

Today, my idiot sister had to have her aged dog put down, then she posts on MY Facebook page, "RIP, Buddy, we'll miss you." My adult children and most of my friends thought I died. FML

#21145745
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46313) - you deserved it (4533)

On 05/19/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by SmittyJA24 - United States (Idaho)



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