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December 2013

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Today, while having sex with my husband, we had to move around our cat during position changes. Our cat controls our sex life. FML

#20978895
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45662) - you deserved it (16969)

On 12/02/2013 at 11:26pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my husband learned that if he asks me a question while I am dead asleep my answer will most likely be "Yes". Incidentally, I now have a new cat. FML

Today, I dropped a $400 bottle of wine while trying to get the cork out. FML

#20982484
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45682) - you deserved it (17463)

On 12/06/2013 at 2:08am - money - by butterfingers - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of five years got me a ring for Christmas. When I opened it, I was speechless and overjoyed. He then said, "It's just a ring. It doesn't mean anything." FML

#21003775
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49173) - you deserved it (5582)

On 12/24/2013 at 3:30pm - love - by Wtfbro (woman) - United States

Today, I got the DVD back from a dance concert I did. After watching it, I realised that I had a camel toe through the whole thing. Three and a half hours. FML

#20992052
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44092) - you deserved it (7078)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Aggie_De (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML

#20990341
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52533) - you deserved it (3370)

On 12/12/2013 at 4:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, while delivering pizzas, someone ordered $19.41 in pizza and wings. After finally finding her appartment, she paid me in two sandwich bags full of pennies and nickels. I had to count them out before giving her the pizza. We aren't allowed to enter the residence, and it was 22 degrees. FML

#20976643
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49776) - you deserved it (3099)

On 12/01/2013 at 2:42am - work - by JudasThePriest (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, marks my third day of school being closed due to snow. One, and only one, of the teachers has decided that we have to do work online in the meantime. I just so happen to be in three of his classes. FML

#20987643
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43862) - you deserved it (4638)

On 12/10/2013 at 12:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I discovered my mom has been using my credit card to buy everyone's Christmas presents. FML

#20995385
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47294) - you deserved it (3602)

On 12/17/2013 at 12:02am - money - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50874) - you deserved it (5906)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML

#20996748
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47694) - you deserved it (5054)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:56am - misc - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend when all of a sudden he stops, grabs my breasts with both hands, makes circular motions with them, and yells, "Daniel-san! Wax on! Wax off! Wax on! Wax off!", killing my orgasm dead. FML

#20981063
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49659) - you deserved it (6151)

On 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by KarateKid76 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to listen to fellow classmates whine about selling one of their many houses, while I can barely afford to pay for a $100 textbook. FML

#20987288
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46079) - you deserved it (3251)

On 12/10/2013 at 1:04am - money - by thefifthdoctor - United States (Washington)



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