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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I could think of more 'pros' than 'cons' for why I should start drinking again. FML

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41536) - you deserved it (9326)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML

#20909928
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50359) - you deserved it (3570)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:54pm - love - by UHM (man) - United States

Today, I had an anxiety attack when I learned that my favorite book series is coming to the end. I had to leave the store and sit in my car. FML

#20930715
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36329) - you deserved it (8123)

On 10/23/2013 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I finally got my driver's permit. To celebrate, my parents decided to go to a bar and make me wait in the car because I'm now the designated driver. FML

#20928623
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44239) - you deserved it (4316)

On 10/21/2013 at 6:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that when my dad said he would pay for my college, he really meant that he was going to forge my signature on a student loan in my name and not make payments on it. FML

#20927730
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45767) - you deserved it (3196)

On 10/20/2013 at 4:34pm - money - by oh... (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend of a year denied in front of everyone that we ever dated. FML

#20930973
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49606) - you deserved it (4633)

On 10/23/2013 at 11:42am - love - by Zkroger (man) - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. The girl seemed perfect for me, until I found out she says "lol" and "rofl" out loud whenever she laughs. She also believes sex screws with people's "spiritual energy", and that's why she'll never have it. FML

#20934761
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42982) - you deserved it (4534)

On 10/26/2013 at 5:27pm - love - by CUCKOO (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I passed my math test with flying colors. My dad thought I had cheated, so he emailed the school and told them that I had. They lowered my grade. FML

#20912578
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57346) - you deserved it (3285)

On 10/08/2013 at 3:17pm - misc - by mathgenius - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, someone tried to steal my backpack from the hook on the bathroom stall. Good news: they were caught off-guard by how heavy it was and dropped it. Bad news: my foot is now broken from using it to cushion the backpack's fall. FML

Today, after sending in my passport application for a trip to Paris, I got a letter from the state department saying despite them having my original birth certificate, I don't exist. Upon calling them, I was told that it only proves I'm a citizen, not that I exist. I pay taxes and have a mortgage. FML

#20916188
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42144) - you deserved it (2337)

On 10/11/2013 at 7:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mom and I got the answer to the question, "Is our dog really dumb enough to jump out of the window of a moving vehicle?" The answer: Yes. FML

#20904318
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41807) - you deserved it (5758)

On 10/02/2013 at 2:36am - animals - by BasketGhost - United States (New York)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42848) - you deserved it (4667)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)



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