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August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mother bitched me out for filing divorce papers against my abusive husband. According to her, it's a "slap in God's face". She's the one who's divorced two husbands so far because they weren't getting job promotions fast enough to support her hoarding habit. FML

#20852500
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46696) - you deserved it (2487)

On 08/24/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while at a concert, my boyfriend got mad and jealous because I kept looking at the singer instead of him. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20834941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48812) - you deserved it (6167)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:58am - love - by really? - United States

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

#20818899
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55235) - you deserved it (8257)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for no real reason via text message. A few hours later, she updated her relationship status on Facebook to "in a relationship." Her new "boyfriend"? Her cat. A mutual friend commented, "Well, he's better than that idiot you had before." FML

#20816836
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50829) - you deserved it (5562)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:53am - love - by tkghan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I suggestively asked my boyfriend to take a shower with me. He got in, washed himself, and got out, ignoring me the whole time. FML

#20852722
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49631) - you deserved it (7201)

On 08/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by -.- - United States

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41118) - you deserved it (4849)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I stopped at a red light, when I noticed the car in front of me was in reverse. I honked at the driver, hoping he'd realize and place the car in drive. He thought the light turned green and immediately backed into me. FML

#20828404
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45343) - you deserved it (5697)

On 08/09/2013 at 1:00am - misc - by please don't back that thing up - United States

Today, I was feeling down because I always think that I'm overweight. My boyfriend tried to prove me wrong by lifting me up. I threw his back out. FML

#20823726
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45620) - you deserved it (9043)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:01pm - health - by GirlfriendsAreBadForYourBack - United States (New York)

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

#20836995
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63397) - you deserved it (8084)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, at the yacht club I work at a girl ordered a Portabella wrap. She asked for no cheese or veggies, just the Portabellas. After she got the sandwich and ate half of it, she sent it back saying she didn't know it had mushrooms in it. FML

#20840141
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43152) - you deserved it (2935)

On 08/16/2013 at 10:05am - work - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I won a year's supply of bath bombs in a competition. I live in a tiny flat by myself with only a shower. I also have to find somewhere to put the bath bombs. FML

#20836641
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34943) - you deserved it (5581)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by KnowWhereYourTowelIs (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML

#20848315
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43680) - you deserved it (21517)

On 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by me (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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