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August 2013

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Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

#20840053
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44251) - you deserved it (3455)

On 08/16/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by hipster glasses - United States

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML

#20848315
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46630) - you deserved it (22897)

On 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by me (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41785) - you deserved it (4922)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was told that I looked like a Kardashian by a total stranger. Flattered, I asked which one. His response? "I don't know, the ugly one." FML

#20848594
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42622) - you deserved it (5484)

On 08/21/2013 at 11:00pm - misc - by theuglyone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my first date in years cancelled on me because she has to "wash the horse's hair." The date was arranged for 9:30pm. FML

#20857695
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39858) - you deserved it (3264)

On 08/28/2013 at 9:25am - misc - by AtLeastHaveADecientExcuse -

Today, I won a year's supply of bath bombs in a competition. I live in a tiny flat by myself with only a shower. I also have to find somewhere to put the bath bombs. FML

#20836641
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37422) - you deserved it (5858)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by KnowWhereYourTowelIs (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and my eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stopped, and I was thrilled because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stopped to order a cheeseburger. FML

#20823062
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55689) - you deserved it (4333)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:11am - health - by mcdonalds - United States

Today, I got the sex talk from my dad. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't said "It's not the size of the stick, it's how you use it." I'm a girl. FML

#20814602
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57520) - you deserved it (4765)

On 08/01/2013 at 1:10am - intimacy - by confused_girl (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML

#20828881
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43948) - you deserved it (14505)

On 08/09/2013 at 10:22am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24161) - you deserved it (46579)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at the yacht club I work at a girl ordered a Portabella wrap. She asked for no cheese or veggies, just the Portabellas. After she got the sandwich and ate half of it, she sent it back saying she didn't know it had mushrooms in it. FML

#20840141
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45013) - you deserved it (3072)

On 08/16/2013 at 10:05am - work - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML

#20860218
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23600) - you deserved it (33906) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/30/2013 at 6:59am - misc - by Anonyme (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

#20823279
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47776) - you deserved it (9335)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:19am - health - by Anonymous - United States



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