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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

#20707362
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51287) - you deserved it (4706)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:08am - misc - by Thanks Honey (woman) - United States

Today, my mother threw away my brand new headphones. She saw them on the couch with duct tape on the wires and assumed they were "old, broken, and cheap." I put the tape there to avoid damaging the wires. FML

#20720827
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45692) - you deserved it (13635)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:59am - money - by why mom, why? - United States (California)

Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML

#20709553
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55788) - you deserved it (11264)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Senegal

Today, I had to explain to my mother that a lace mini-dress with an obscene amount of cleavage was not appropriate to wear while meeting my boyfriend's parents. She called me an "annoying prude" and said that with my attitude, I don't deserve to have a man. FML

#20715817
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48528) - you deserved it (4689)

On 06/09/2013 at 4:49pm - misc - by kalisa anteater (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. I woke up right as the dentist pulled my last tooth. FML

#20708877
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51883) - you deserved it (3329)

On 06/06/2013 at 1:01am - health - by Applejacks18 (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I got more pleasure from scratching a bug bite than I've gotten from my boyfriend in 2 whole years. FML

#20728644
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53614) - you deserved it (10874)

On 06/16/2013 at 1:10am - intimacy - by sex deprived (woman) - United States

Today, I overheard my dad telling my mum that the only way I'm ever going to get into a relationship is if I "pose as a woman and con some gullible bastard online." He's probably right. FML

#20754680
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42583) - you deserved it (4695)

On 06/29/2013 at 5:49pm - love - by cheerbabeXoXo (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to stay out of our apartment. About half-way through, my roomate blared "The Eye of the Tiger" from the other side of the door. My girlfriend laughed so hard that we couldn't finish. FML

#20733192
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60201) - you deserved it (8410)

On 06/18/2013 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53648) - you deserved it (3674)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, I was giving a presentation to my college class. I've had a natural stutter my whole life, so I stuttered through the whole thing. My professor tried to hold in her laughter for 15 minutes. FML

#20719870
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45638) - you deserved it (2497)

On 06/11/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by stutterboy (man) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter believed that watching the Big Bang Theory would count as studying for her chemistry final. FML

#20733887
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44741) - you deserved it (6799)

On 06/18/2013 at 7:22pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was invited to a party. Since I rarely get invited to any, I was super pumped. Both my parents work late, so I texted a couple of people to see if I could catch a ride. It turned out everyone's cars were full. I ended up missing one of the only parties I've ever been invited to. FML

#20702631
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54938) - you deserved it (7006)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by my_only_friend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend announced to everyone at dinner that she was no longer a virgin. This was news to everyone: her parents, siblings, best friend, and me. FML

#20742151
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69582) - you deserved it (4636)

On 06/23/2013 at 2:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)



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